You ever get these thoughts that make you feel like an outright sadist? make you feel like a monster? like there's a little curled up part of you against the dark corner of your mind and soul that intrusively comes out to terrify you with thoughts that a normal person shouldn't have?
I've had this creature in me since childhood. i let it out a few times but it shocked my core and so i locked it away and ate the key. but still in the depths of my dejection it lurks. dark and hidden. it wants to inflict pain, it wants to savor the look of fear and agony of its victims. watch their faces wrinkle in despair, their wails and screams as they realize its all far from over. but its not simple. no, this creature is picky. it prefers the weak over the rest. the helpless. the dependent. the innocent. it wants to take that uncorrupt innocence of the mind and soul and break it. crush it and twist it and smash it and break it again. until those souls look like what it feels like. it feels empowered by their suffering. feels fuller by their pain. it can breathe again. such is the creature that prowls in the ruins of my being, slowly fading. such is the creature i can never let out and only hope to forget.
YOU ARE READING
Life Of "A"
Non-FictionEver think nobody can relate to your situation? This is my story, and how i thought this so often that i have resulted to writing this. Truths, thoughts, experiences i have, all laid bare and raw. This is A Diary . THIS IS NOT FICTION.
