ASIA Pov
"Drama, Drama, Drama, That's all that there really is in my circle. I'm not even sure if it's even a circle anymore. More so like a line. Nobody fucks with anybody anymore. My sister, she just up and disappeared, me and my supposedly best friend fell out because of my insecurities and I lost the love of my life due to my insecurities. That's why I'm here now, to work on my insecurities."
Dr. Locke kept his eyes on me the whole time but still somehow managed to scribble something onto his notepad.
"There is a reason for your actions Ms. Bankz. It's more than your insecurities." He said starring me directly in my eyes. I looked at him and he looked as if he was starring a hole through my soul.
"No, I honestly believe it's my insecurities. I know myself."
"It's more than that."
"It's not." I said biting on the side of my lips. He was all of a sudden making me nervous
"Yes it is, your hiding something and I see right through you. "
"It's not."
"Asia, Look I'm here to help you. The first step to fixing a problem is to address the problem. You can't heal something and you don't know what you're healing." He said. I looked at him and my palms began to get sweaty and clammy.
"Okay.....your right." I mumbled. He starred at me and started writing some more stuff down. "It's not my insecurities, I'm.......it's just that ......I'm ....I'm scared." I admitted. "I'm scarred everything is going to turn out how it did before when I was with my ex. I've been through hell and back. Abused emotionally and physically. About 2 boyfriends ago my then current boyfriend cheated on me with a close friend of mine and I caught them in action. It hurted." I said as I felt the tears well up in my eyes. "It hurted me to my core. Someone that was extremely close to me betrayed me. They betrayed me after I gave them both my all. I actually trusted them. For the first time in my life I actually thought I had found my forever. You know, that best friend you want as your maid of honor and that guy you wanna spend the rest of your life with? That was my life. They meant so much to me. Him and Her. Back then I didn't even think life was worth moving on with if they weren't by my side. She was my right hand, left hand, my rib, my heart, my bitch, my A1 day 1. She knew what the fuck I was going through but yet she betrayed me. She acted as if she cared and everything. What she expressed to me I , in all honesty ......" I paused" I, thought it was truly genuine. I did. Honestly. But to find your best friend legs tied to the headboard and the love of your life buried 8 inches deep inside of her is heartbreaking. It's really heartbreaking."
"How did it make you feel" He questioned. I eyed him as the tears fell freely from off my face.
"I was angry. "I said starring off into space reminiscing on that day as if it was yesterday" I was very angry, more so hurt. That day I could feel the coldness in my heart. Seem like my chest froze over. The whole incident made me feel like I wasn't good enough. As if I'm lacking in my looks or something."
"Did you speak to him after the incident."
"No, I haven't and I won't"
"If you were to see him today, would you acknowledge his presence."
" I have nothing to say to him."
He nodded head and wrote in his notebook again.
"How do you feel your relationship with your ex has affected your current relationships"
"I feel like one day someone close is going to steal someone I love. "
"Is it Jealousy" he questioned. I mugged him.
