BTS HYYH Notes (Book 1, 2, BUS Game) // COMPLETE [Part 2]

2022, May 13 - Jimin (I'm Not Allowed To Dream)

[Place: Hospital]

I sit on my bed and stare at my feet. I can't bear to look at eommeoni's face. I should have just stayed in the room. I shouldn't have followed them. I should have stayed put like she told me to.

"It was a lie, wasn't it?"

"Huh?"

"What those kids said earlier. Do you think I wouldn't notice?"

"...I'm sorry." It feels like something's caught in my throat.

"What were you going to do? What could you possibly do outside of this place?"

At eommeoni's question, all the things I've thought about alone in the lounge come to mind. Go to school, make friends, and learn dance from Hoseok-ie hyung again. I want to live a regular life. It's nothing that special. Why is it that I'm not allowed to dream?

"Jimin-ah, let's focus on getting better first. When you're all better... I'll let you do whatever you want once you're discharged. But you know that now isn't the time. Let's do it when you're back to normal."

There's a power I can't fight in eommeoni's voice. But eommeoni... What is 'getting better', and what's normal? The questions I can't voice continue to pile up inside.

I hold it all in and nod. I don't want to make things any more difficult for her. "Okay, eommeoni. I will."

As I say those words, I start to think... that I don't think I'll ever get to leave this place.