Icy Eyes, Icy Hearts

Icy Eyes, Icy Hearts #15

Dear Readers,

This chapter touches on a  few issues and maybe a little to hard for some to read. I am sorry for that. I really do hope you liked this chapter as depressing as it is.

Also thank you to all those who fanned or even just read this story, it's not nearly over yet so I hope you will all stick by as the chapters keep coming.

CHAPTER 15

Alora's room  was a mess paper and clothes were all over the place. Her dresser drawers were empty, as with her closet. Draco walked into her bathroom and noticed that glass was lying all over the floor

 There was also a black note book lying half open. Picking it up he noticed a sticky substance on the cover and some of the pages. Looking closer at the book and his hands he noticed it was blood. He gasped and quickly opened the book to the first page.

The Diary Of A Cutter

Well diary I guess this is my first entry. I might as well say this now, I'm a cutter and no one knows. Yup me the prized Derch child. The magical prodigy who does no wrong and always seems so happy. But nope I'm a cutter, see the thing is I never used to cut, but everyone has to start somewhere. When I was 13 I started going out with this guy. He was really really nice at first, but that changed. He became controlling and really mean. He would hit me if I did anything wrong. It was so hard to hide the bruises from my parents, even worse my brothers. I had to learn some quick spells. But hey I guess that's my fault for dating a guy who was 3 years older then me eh. After about 2 months of dating him I cut for the first time. It was great I know weird to say but it made me feel so much better. See I had no control in my relationship but I had control over my cutting. That was also the year I became an anorexic. See the guy I was dating..oh I might as well tell you his name...Brad...he thought I was fat. He would tell me that I had to lose weight and everything. So because I thought he loved me I did as he asked. I stopped eating. I ended up in the hospital in the end. My parents found out about Brad and told me to stop seeing him. I fought it at first, I thought I loved him. I thought he loved me. But finally after a lot of fighting and tears I agreed. We called the Ministry Of Magic in our area because after I broke up with him, he would send me curses in letters and threatened to kill me and my family. There was one time he actually apperated into my room, that was the night of the rape. I was the only one home so no one could hear my screams. I finally stopped screaming and sat there crying until he was done. He left the minute his pants were on and I cried to myself in the dark. I couldn't move from the floor. It was late when my brother got home. He must have heard my sobs because he opened the door and found me. That was the moment I became fully grateful for my family. They helped me through everything. It took so long to finally be able to look at myself in the mirror without seeing the rape all over again. But yea..my family was amazing, they let me have my time and were patient. After about a year I felt like my life was getting back on track. I stopped cutting and I started eating again. There were times where it was still really tough but I had my family to get me through. Until a few weeks ago. The ones who had helped me through,  my parents and brothers were killed. I stopped eating again. It got pretty bad to the point that I fainted at their funerals. I ended up in the hospital again. To make matters worse, I'm living with a my parents best friends, which is no issue. The problem is, I'm in love with their son my childhood best friend I hadn't seen in years. I have known him since the day we were born. Wonderful eh diary. But yes..Narcissa..the mother..has had house elves watching me since I got home from the hospital so I have had to eat. However what she doesn't know that if I have to eat then I will do something else that I can control. This is where the diary starts, along with my cutting. Again.

Draco continued to read the diary. He felt sick to his stomach as he read. She talked about him a lot  how he ignored her and everything in the entries that followed. Finally it came to an interesting entry dated yesterday. She must have come up after they talked before tea quickly to write this.

Diary,

You wouldn't believe it, I told him everything. And believe it or not he felt the same way about me. We had a long long talk and he told me he loved me to. I am so happy. But you want to hear the funniest thing. I came up here to my room to get my razor and you know make a couple cuts before tea. Well I sat in the bathroom and as I brought the razor to my stomach I looked at myself in the mirror. I was smiling. I haven't really smiled since before my parents died. I was actually smiling and then I just put the razor down and walked away. I still feel like I want to make a quick cut but I know I don't have to. It was hard yes to walk away from it but I think it is for the better. Well I better get going I have to get to tea with Draco and yell at him about some dress he mentioned. Bugger better not be planning anything dumb. Ha ha.

Thank you for being something to vent to. Hopefully any more entries will be happy ones:).

All of a sudden Draco saw the entry that was dated for that day. Less then 24 hours later and the mood had changed terribly.

My dearest friend,

It was just yesterday that I was putting the razor down and walking away from my life as a bleeder. Now today has been the breaking point. I have been lied to, and I have been hurt by my only true love. Does he realize it? No. And I doubt he will. I picked up the razor today. I actually dug it out of the garbage. I needed to destroy this pain and I felt that seeing the flow of the crimson blood would help. I have never cut this deep or as much before. My head feels light as the red liquid drips on to your pages. I know I should stop the blood from seeping out of my many new wounds but I cant stop it. It is the only thing that keeps my mind off the tears. Well my dear friend, as my head starts to feel light I remember I must leave. I am going away from this place that has brought me so much hurt and heartache. I need to get away from the boy who I gave my heart to and he stomped on it. Thank you for being the one whom no matter what you were there under my pillow at anytime for me to write in.

With all my memories,

Alora

Draco had tears in his eyes as he read the last entry. She was gone. He had to find her and tell her that Pansy was lying. He needed to tell her that he does care about her. With that Draco threw the book onto the floor and ran out of her room. As the book hit the floor an invisible wind blew the pages around. As they stopped dancing the book lay pen to a page near the back that Draco had missed. On the page was a picture of a young Alora and Draco. The 2 children hugged each other and waved to a person who was not there. Above the children's smiling faces, written in what seems like silver ink was this;

 My only true love, is my only true enemy.

************DRACO'S POV*********

I ran down to fathers study. There was something in there I had to find. It would help me find Alora, but at a risk. What I was looking for was a tool used by Voldemort himself. It was something my father told me never to touch, however for Alora I would risk death.