Player Of Hearts [ N. Romanoff × Female Reader ]

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟿: A Way Out

That night, Natasha found herself leaving the camp without a word to anyone, and even though it was two in the morning she insisted on walking back to the compound. Alone and cold in the streets of uptown New York yet that didn't matter, she just walked, and platonically there was no tears left her eyes, she was stone cold staring from afar but her mind was travelling a million miles that even her can't catch up to it.

Love is for children.

It was whispered to her ears like it used to when she was trapped in that four walls with Madame B feeding her with nonsense words, which she had fallen to believe.

She was stupid to say the least that she let herself believe you, to believe in love, when in reality she was doing just fine without it. Because let's face it, she's Natasha Romanoff, she was taught clearly from a young age that love is for children and nothing but just a game of two people fooling each other, causing life to be more misreable.

Love is a weakness.

For her, it is. Love is a distraction, it can be used as a key to find a person's weakness. The love that you hold for someone is stronger than anything else, that is why you protect it at all cause, you would die fo it, hence, a weakness.

Natasha can sacrifice herself at anytime, because she's a hero, she is meant to sacrifice her life for the better of the others, she doesn't call it love, but rather it is her job, it is what she promised to do.

I'm sorry.

A word that she despise the most, and now coming from you is a huge disapointment. It wasn't because you apologized, but it was because you made her trust you only for you to break it. You made her fall inlove, and even though you did not intend to — for her you did. You played her heart, never ever forget that.

It's complicated.

For the both of you, yes. Complicated in so many ways yet so different. Loving is hard, it's the hardest thing in the world, you can go wrong or right with it, you can go up and down along the way, but if you fight, in the end you will win, but rarely ever pass through those phases because maybe love isn't enough anymore for them to keep fighting, so they close that door, go back and restart, some are stuck in that path, people who can not let go, who refuse to accept and re-start.

But in your situation, you're running away from it, and Natasha, the person you had taught to love, fell for you, she liked you so damn much but you threw all that away for her safety, so if someone told me that you were an idiot, I would say that you did the right thing, because you chose to protect her rather than telling her you love her too.

Days passed after the incident at the camp, people in the compound was back in their normal routine, it stayed the same with Loki coming in and out as if this place became his second home, Tony didn't mind though but he was still distant from him.

But the highlight of this past few days was Natasha's disappearance from time to time, she didn't talk to anyone and no one ever saw her around, except for the AI but the camera footage was confidential as she requested. Not just her, but also you, you've rarely came out of your room, you started sneaking around past midnight to get some leftover food in the kitchen and most of the time you were using your powers to persuade anyone that comes near you, even just a normal-innocent bird started dying on the window pane under your gaze.

Then, this midnight happened.

Lurking around the corridors in your pajama's with matching socks was the fourth time this night, you couldn't sleep and you were craving for something sweet and sour, but you couldn't find anything.

"Sorry," You quietly made a grunt when your shoulder bump into someones but you payed no attention to who it was.

"Watch where you're going," The person replied in a rude manner and she sounded annoyed.

Your legs was already planted on one spot, nose sniffling to a familiar scent that you have grown addicted to, making you close your eyes to settle in the moment, and when they spoke, the voice confirmed your suspicion. You spun around and looked at the person walking back to where you came from.

"Nat," You mentally noted but you didn't expect to say it outloud, making you wince when she also stopped from her tracks.

She furrowed her eyebrows in annoyance, she knew it was you. She also knows that every night you go out to the kitchen and you'd spend hours eating foods to your liking.

"What?" She spat the words quietly and you slightly jumped a little but it's a good thing that she has her back on you.

"Nothing," You responded but she didn't move. "Uhm, where have you been?" You asked instead.

"Nowhere," She replied plainly, voice sounding firm as her jaw clenched a little. "Why do you even care?" It wasn't a question, it was a statement, she was avoiding to tell you that since she knew you were soft-hearted and that you cry easily to hurtful words.

"I-I don't," Your lips quivered ever so slightly, eyes starting to get foggy. "Sorry again," You finally finished, proceeding to walk down the stairs so you would get over it already.

When your words left your mouth and registered in Natasha's brain, she ignored the fact that you sounded off and you kept apologizing, it was like she was deaf, that the only thing she could hear was the words whispered in her ears over and over again. She was like sinking in her own ocean of thoughts filled with words that came out like a water, drowning her little by little. That's not even the worst part.

The worst part is that you could feel a million times to what she's feeling, the consequences of her actions was paid off by you — she loves you and as long as she does she will suffer same as you do but worst.

"Shit," You hissed under your breath as the world started to spin, surroundings getting darker and before you knew it, your head hit the floor, hard.

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