Fighting For Eachother

better

Anastasia's pov

We are now at Ria's house.

The drive back was....weird.

It was silent and uncomfortable but Ria tried to make us all brighter. She talked about what were gonna do.

We will bake cookies so we can watch movies, talk and I think that's it. Oh yeah, we will also play some games if we won't get tired.

So as I said, we are at her's now and we will bake cookies. Her mom isn't home so we're alone. Which is great, to be honest.

"Okay, let's change into something not so....wet" Briana said and looked at all of us when she processed what she actually said

Okay good, I'm not the only one that's dirty here

"GUYS! SHUT UP!" she yelled and grabbed me to go upstairs to change, I only laughed even more

We got upstairs and Briana was commenting how stupid they are

I changed into random hoodie she gave me and I kept my joggers on.
She changed into something more fashionable but comfy. She was in some really-looking-comfy set.

I would still pick hoodie and joggers.

"I'm so sorry. You know you can talk to me yknow? You don't have to fake your happiness and lie about it. I can see that your not okay" she said as she was changing earlier

I hugged her and told her thank you, but I can't believe her. I can't believe what she's saying. I just can't.

You would understand if your being in the same house for a lot of years with the same people I am with.

I mean, my parents.

But I hope you don't understand it. Ever.

Somebody, asking me for talk to them? Nah man, that's bullshit. I do not deserve that.

I don't even deserve all this. Her, her friends, her mom..

She doesn't need to worry about me, my mental state ,my disorders and my traumas.

She told me to vent. I didn't want to but she just feels like comfort and I thought it would be okay, so I told her about some of my traumas.

But I can't tell her every-thing.

I want my life to en-

"Alright, let's go to downstairs and let's try to have good and nice sleepover"

Wow wow wow. Hold up.

Sleepover?

....
Sleepover!?

SLEEPOVER.

I always wished to have friends and do that with them. I mean yeah, I was having a sleepover- I mean my friends had sleep-over at my house and my ex boyfriend did, but it ended up giving me more trauma. I rather not talk about it right now.

Don't want to make this even more bad.

"Are you for real? Like, you can say if I'm bothering you or something" I said to Ria when we started going out of her room and downstairs

"Yes I'm for real and don't be silly , your not bothering the heck Stas? Don't think that" she said and said hugged me

I really can't be more grateful for her.

She doesn't deserve somebody so dumb and numb like I am.

"Thank God, at least you did something" she said when she saw them and snacks on the table

So many calories

I don't think I should eat that. But I also don't want to be thrown in attention and have questions all around me. So I will act like I'm eating it.

I also never tried anything like that I think. Ok, maybe when I was younger.

"Guys move. I'm serious" She said and I was confused, I entered the living room now fully and she turned to look at me

"Stasia! Fuckers won't move! I want to sit with you! "

I looked around and it was literally the other half of couch behind her
"We can sit here" I said as I sat down

"Nooo!!! I want to be infront of the TV. Just move!" She told them and after a while they did move

"This is ridiculous. We will sit with you guys, you both are tiny as fuck. You don't even cover half of the couch" said James and boys agreed, suddenly they sat besides us

Kayden sat beside James that sat besides Ria, I was watching Mason as he didn't want to sit besides me?

"Mason sit the fuck down" Ria said and Mason talked back and ouch

"No way in hell I'm sitting besides her. I'm clean and she- " before he could say anything I got up and told him to sit as I moved to another couch, then I saw realization in his eyes, he told me he won't say anything

And I thought we were good.

Everyone's attention is on me right now. Fucking hell.

They didn't question it and after a time "Stas, just get her-" Ria started talking but I cut her off

"Just start the movie, I don't really care" I said as I was keeping my gaze on the TV screen

I could feel her gaze on me but she clicked the movie on

I don't even know what movie is playing and we just started it, but I'm getting sleepy.

I thought now that we will come to her house, everything would be better. But apparently not.

I also thought me and Mason were good but oh no. He literally told me he won't say shit to anyone and he just almost did.

I need to be more careful of what I'm doing and what I'm saying.

"Um Anastasia?" Ria called and I turned my head to her "yeah?"

"We stopped the movie and asked you if you want to go to McDonald's and buy stuff with us" she said

I don't really know, I want to stay here. I'm tired.

"I think I will rather stay here if I can? Sorry. I'm little bit tired"

"Okay, no worries. So Mason and you will stay he-"

"Nevermind. I'm gonna go." I said and stand up

She looked at me confused "Didn't you just said you were tired?"

"Yeah I did, I'm not anymore. Let's go?" I said and started walking to doors

*****

I was sitting in the backseat with Kayden and I swear I was almost getting asleep but Ria asked us what do we want from McDonald's

"Big Mac menu and add 9 nuggets and  cheeseburger" Kayden said from besides me

I would of never eat that. But I think he's playing some sport, Ria told me, so he needs to eat yeah

"Alright, and you Stas?"

Shit. Um. "I'm not actually hungry" I said and Kayden and Ria turned their heads to me and James was looking at me thru  rearview mirror

"I'm not hungry for real and also, we have snacks home so if I want something I will eat that yeah?" I asked Ria and she nodded

"You sure you don't want anything?" She asked and I nodded

I want cheeseburger. Like really badly. But I know I can't. So I won't ask for it obviously.

"Why?"

"Huh?" I turned to Kayden

"Why don't you want anything" he said and added "it's McDonald's" I almost laugh

"I already said I'm not hungry" I said as I shrugged and my voice became more frustrated

God, sorry.