All Of Us Are Ghosts Here (Jegulus / Wolfstar Fic)

Nine ~ The Next Morning

Sirius~

No TWs, I think. Same rule applies as always.

Sirius Black was commonly known as the king of poor decisions, but this time he was sure he'd taken the cake.

He was awake all night thinking about what had happened in the common room. First, he'd annoyed Remus. Then he insulted him. Then he almost kissed him.

What was wrong with him?

Sirius knew what he had to do. It's what he'd done since his first week at Hogwarts, when he was scared and homesick and just a little lonely. So when the sun rose, he rose with it.

It was time to talk to Minnie.

...

"Mr. Black, come in," Professor McGonagall said when she saw the boy in the doorway of her office.

Sirius sagged with relief. Even after seven years, he was still always a little afraid she'd turn him away. But she hadn't, not even once.

Minerva McGonagall was more like a mother to him than anyone else had ever been. Even Effie Potter, the woman who took him in when he had nothing, couldn't take that spot from his head of house.

As Sirius took a seat in one of the overstuffed chairs in front of Minnie's desk, he saw her pull a little tin box out of her desk drawer.

"I take it you need to talk?" she asked as she held the tin of biscuits out to him.

He nodded as he took one. "I- yeah. About my brother... and Remus." He wasn't afraid of his professor's reaction. She knew already how he felt. She'd known since that night early into their sixth year, when he was being questioned about the "prank" he'd pulled on Snape. He didn't like to think of that night. He didn't like to think of the past at all, actually.

But at least one good thing had come of it. He'd learned that McGonagall was a safe person to trust with his growing... whatever it was... for Remus.

She knew him better than he knew himself, if that was possible.

Minnie nodded for him to continue.

"Well, Regulus... He wrote me. This summer." Sirius pulled the little note out of his pocket. He hadn't let go of it since he received it, afraid that he'd dreamt it.

To her credit, McGonagall didn't seem all that fazed.

"So... Yeah. We're going to talk to Dumbledore later today, I think. But that's- well, it's not why I'm here. I did something stupid, I think? I mean, I'm always doing stupid things, but I'm pretty sure this is the most stupid thing I've done and-"

"Sirius Black," McGonagall said, stopping his nervous rambling. "Whatever it is can't be that bad, seeing as I haven't heard anything from the headmaster. Or the authorities. It's alright, just tell me what happened."

He took a deep breath.

"Well, I sort of- I mean, I kinda... I almost kissed him? I think? Merlin, this is embarrassing. But it's like- we were in the common room, and he was just- UGH. I'm an idiot." He buried his face in his hands, feeling more than a little embarrassed at having just told his professor all of that. But, as he said, Minnie was like a mother to him. She'd know what to do.

"I see. And How did Mr. Lupin react?"

Sirius shook his head, which was still in his hands. "I mean, Evans came down, and then he sorta- ran off, I guess? Also, I think I insulted him, so..."

"You think, or you know?"

"I know." He looked up at her. Her face was serious, but still kind. That signature McGonagall look. He took a shaky breath. "I think there's something wrong with me."

She let out a little laugh at that. "Sirius, I want you to remember that you're only seventeen. You aren't always going to make the right choice, or do things the way you should. That's alright because nobody expects you to. I'm far older than you, and I don't always get things right either. There's nothing wrong with you."

"But I've ruined everything! What if he never wants to talk to me again?" He felt something drip onto his hand, and he went to wipe his cheeks. He hadn't realized he was crying.

"Mr. Lupin is your friend, and he's far too mature for the silent treatment. Things will go back to normal with you two soon. But I suggest you think long and hard about whether you want things to go back to normal."

"Of course I want things to go back to normal!" Sirius said, feeling just a bit of irrational anger swell up. At him, at Minnie. Hell, even at Remus. "What other option is there? It's not like I could just-"

"There's always another option, Mr. Black. And you don't need to decide what you want right now, or in a week, or even a month. But I suggest you think about it, and most importantly, talk about it. With your friends, or with me. My door is always open."

McGonagall, always so rational. The worst part was, she was right.

After a minute, Sirius nodded and stood. "Thank you, Professor. I should probably go."

McGonagall nodded. "Anytime, Mr. Black."

Sirius left the room feeling a little lighter than he had before. Today would be awkward, but it would be alright. Remus would go back to being his friend, and they'd forget anything ever happened.

He pushed down the bit of disappointment he felt at the thought before going off to find his friends.

((Longest part yet! 

I won't lie, this one was hard to write. This whole chapter will be, honestly. What I'm saying is basically: Have some patience with me. I hope to publish every other day, but that might not happen. Lots of stuff going on, yadda yadda, blah blah blah. 

Anyways, hope y'all are enjoying the story so far! I'm trying to decide if I want an honest Dumbles (a major asshole) or if I want a redeemable one, so let me know what ya think.

See you on Wednesday!))