~~DISCONTINUED~~
(a brief summary of the ending is available to read in the final update)
Regulus, the perfect son. Regulus, the spare heir. Regulus, the lost cause.
Finally, after enduring years of abuse, he wants out. So, he writes a letter. And a...
TW: Child abuse, torture, and The Prank. Prepare yourselves, this is a hard (but necessary) part.
Sirius was aware of four events in his life that had changed everything.
The first, when he was sorted into Gryffindor. Before then, he'd always thought his parents loved him in their own way. Sure, they could be cruel, but they were still his parents. They loved him, or so he thought. But when the death threats in the form of howlers started showing up, he gave up the notion. It was stupid, anyway. Just the naive wish of a scared little boy.
The second time his life changed forever was the summer after his fifth year. Although he'd long since given up believing his parents had any love for him, he never thought they'd go so far as to actually try to kill him. He still can't remember what warranted punishment that time, but they used the cruciatus curse on him so many times he'd thought he'd never breathe right again.
The curse felt like being ripped apart from the inside. It was nearly impossible to describe the level of pain it inflicted, but the torture wasn't the worst of what happened those long three days before he left.
No, the worst was when his mother grew bored of watching him thrash around in pain. Walburga was more skilled than Orion at inflicting pain, so she cast the curse. But whenever she relented, just when Sirius thought it might be over, his father would step in.
Orion Black was skilled in legilimency, and he seemed to find an infinite amount of joy in forcing Sirius to live out his worst nightmares. They were horrific, the things his father showed him. Watching his friends die, watching Regulus being tortured in his stead, and so much more. All so realistic he thought they were actually happening.
Sirius had to play dead before they finally stopped, just leaving him to lie there in the parlor. When he finally got the strength to move again, to open his eyes, Regulus was standing in the doorway, staring at him. Neither brother spoke. Neither had the words.
Regulus didn't stop him when he stumbled out of the house, didn't say a word as Sirius walked slowly down the sidewalk, heading to god knows where.
Sirius didn't know how the Potters found him, but now he thought his little brother might have had something to do with it.
Less than six months later came the third life-altering event. And this one was entirely Sirius' fault.
Sirius had been in a dark place since that summer, but that wasn't an excuse. What he did had no excuse.
Because in early September, the night of the full moon, Sirius sent Severus Snape into the Shrieking Shack, knowing it could kill him. Knowing it could destroy Remus.
And he laughed as he did it. He laughed.
When the screaming started, Sirius realized the implications of what he'd done. It was too late to stop it by that point.
Nobody got hurt. Not physically, at least. Sirius was removed from the Quidditch team, but they did nothing else to him, no matter how much he begged. Because he deserved so much worse, and he knew it. What he had done was unforgivable.
And yet, Remus forgave him. Not for a while, of course. But Remus forgave him.
There was a reason Sirius never thought of the past. It was painful to think about. Instead, he'd always pushed the past away, separated himself from it. He knew it wasn't healthy, but he didn't care. It had kept him alive, and that was enough.
The fourth time his life changed was a change for the better, though it didn't seem that way at first.
The fight with Remus. When he thought back on it, he didn't see himself standing in that courtyard.
He saw Orion Black.
He saw a young man who lied and hurt people simply because he could, because he didn't want to face his emotions.
Sirius saw that and he was horrified. He went to Minnie, as he had so many times before. She helped him to understand.
Sirius didn't want to become like his father. But that's exactly who he was turning into.
And so the boy who lived his life in the present thought at last of his past. And it hurt. It hurt far more than he'd expected, but it was worth it.
He loved to say he wasn't a liar. Maybe now it could actually be true.
Sirius Black was many things, and healing was, finally, one of them.
((Sirius Black?? Acknowledging his past and learning from it?? It's more likely than you think.
It's a short one, but there really was nothing else to say. Sorry about the lack of dialogue, it felt out of place given the contents of the part.
Also, I'm going camping so no more updates this weekend (unless we end up having wifi, which I doubt)
Final thing, what should Regulus' marauder name be? I know I want something to do with snakes, but I can't decide what.
Have a meme.))
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