Chapter 29

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And I know in my heart
You're not a constant star :-
Fool's gold by one direction

Josephine Langford

I have this headache in my head, which is irritating the fuck outta me and Hero just standing here not uttering any fucking thing is more irritating.

I scowl at him while he just stand and kept looking on the floor.

"You gonna utter any fucking thing?!?"

He visibly flinch on my voice.

I don't know why my hormones are all over the place.
I guess mums death fucked my head.

Soon my fucked up irritated mind was emotional.

Mum? Her funeral....what about it?
How am I gonna live without any of my parent? First dad? Now mum?

"Look...I never meant for it..."
He trail off.

Hero Finneas Tiffin

I reluctantly look up.

"Jo?"
I rushed by her side.
"Jo?! What happened?"

I didn't even said anything yet!

I engulf her in my arms as she lash out and stared sobbing. Clutching on me for dear life.

"Why?! Why?! Why everyone I love is leaving me?! First you! Then dad! Now mum! Who's next? Ansel? Kath?! Please...why is the god so cruel to me? What did I do to him?"

"Shhh...shhhhh." I cooed her.

She had bottles up her feelings for so long. She must have been hard for her.

She had so much faith in me and I broke it but she still loves me. When she said, it broke her when I left....boosted my ego and gave my selfish heart a meaningless hope.

"Please don't cry. Please." I whisper in her hair. Kissing her hairline, rubbing her back.

"Why did you do that to me, Hero? Why? What did I do? I thought we were going good."

My heart drop.
All this time I've been waiting to explain myself but now that I've the chance..I wanna be coward and leave like every other time.

I stare out of the window. I couldn't bring myself to look at her. Just by her voice I know how broke she is. If I'll look in her eyes...I won't be able to say shit!

"You didn't do nothing. It was me. It was me...me..who was stupid enough to leave. Ever since the day you found out I've regretted everything. I was so alone when I was there and she was there. She comforted me when I was in need for you. She helped me. One thing lead to another and we spent the night together but even after everything my love for you never died. I loved you. I wanted to stop it but I didn't. I didn't...I don't know why..I loved you but I also loved her. When you found out about it at first..I didn't feel anything then slowly I started missing you. Started comparing her to you. I was trying to find you in her....you mean the world to me...after everything I couldn't bring myself to face you or your voice so I just didn't do anything and kept on torturing myself but little did I know...it was not complete torture...I kept Inanna to myself for me....for when I feel like no one care about me I would have her. She loved me.....My heart was being selfish. I became selfish.
That day when Ansel proposed and you said yes. My heart broke and I realised how you would have felt when you found out I cheated on you. My heart broke into atoms. I realised and went through the pain you went through.
It killed me every-time he kissed you or touched you. That's when I realised what torture means. The torture I was giving myself was nothing compared to the one which karma gave me.
I was dying every goddamn day. I want you to move on and have a happy life with Ansel but-but my heart is so selfish that he doesn't want to see you with anyone but me.
So I planned all of this to win you back. I thought one way or another I'll have you close to me but...look where we are now...you discovered it...;you discovered it in the most unique way and at the worst time.
I tried to remove Ansel out of my way. I threaten him and did everything in my power to make him insecure so he'd leave you himself but he didn't.
Because he loves you...He truly loves you.
I know you hate me now but I love you. Just know that I'll always be waiting for you. If you ever change your mind and feel like you wanna be with me...I'm always waiting....even if you don't, just remember me in your happy memories....?I want you to smile when you think about me. Just smile when you think about me..."
A tear escape my eyes and dropped in her hair.

I close my eyes and gently place a kiss on her forehead.
My lips ghosted over her forehead and lingered there more than I should've have. Savouring every moment I have with her.

Who knows
Perhaps it's my last time seeing her.

I turn and left the ward without utter anything else.
My heart burning from pain and my head aching from the thoughts running in it.

Josephine Langford

Why did this left like an unsaid goodbye? Did he really left me for goods?

I just kept burning holes in his back whilst he walked out of my ward.

Will we ever see each other again?
I always wants him to leave me but now that he's doing it. I'm breaking.

My heart hurts.
Perhaps he did make his way in my heart again or he never left....

A/N

Hey! I hope you'll will like it!
Have a good time!
Thank you for waiting
I love you guys
All the love
Isha.

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