Our choice

|chapter 11|

Our Choice

If you're smart, you care.
And if you care, you love.

✿

"So, what are you going to do?"

"What do you mean?" I shout back. I just finished taking a shower. At this moment I'm standing in my bedroom, deciding what I should wear today.

It's Sunday morning, four days passed since Theo left. Which doesn't mean I've been alone, because Zoë insisted on staying with me. She keeps telling me it's because we haven't seen each other in a while, that we both need to make some time to hang out. But little do I know she just wants to make sure that I'm alright. I know she wants to be sure that I won't break down again.

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah, of course," I answer when I hear Zoë knocking on my door.

As soon as the words leave my mouth, the door opens and a happy Zoë walks into my room.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she tells me when she sees I'm only wearing underwear. "I can wait a minute if you want me to."

"No dude. It's okay," I say with a smile and give her a sign with my hand, showing her I don't really care.

I've never felt uncomfortable with nudity to be honest. Especially not with good friends or family. Of course I'd like to have some parts of my body covered, but I really couldn't care less about the fact that friends might see me in my bikini or underwear. Don't get me wrong, I did have this time when I was a teenager where I was unsure about my body. I thought I was way too skinny and just couldn't gain weight, which is still the case now. But I got over it. Because this is my body, and it's the only body I will ever have. There's no chance I'll ever be able to change the way my body is built, so I might as well start to accept it.

I hear Zoë letting herself fall on my bed behind me. While I'm considering whether to wear a white or green shirt, she starts talking. "It surprises me that you wear a bra though, I thought you said that you don't wear one most of the time." Hearing her mouth form this words, I just know she must be smirking.

A giggle escapes my mouth as I answer, "I do wear bras, dude!" Turning around, I try to look serious at her. Which doesn't turn out that well, because a smile appears on my face as fast as I tried to hide it before.

Zoë bursts out laughing. "Then what was it what I read?"

"I don't know what you read about me, but I can tell you it's not true. I don't wear bras at home but I surely do when I go outside."

I turn around, facing my closet once again. Deciding to go with the white shirt, I also grab a pair of jeans. I put on my clothes as fast as I can, because I know that the earlier we leave this apartment, the less people are going to be at the mall.

Yesterday, Zoë had this amazing idea of visiting the mall today. I'm not really the shopping type, but I haven't been out in a while so it'll be good for me. We decided to leave early in the morning, so we could eat something there without having dozens of fans intruding us.

Behind me, I hear Zoë humming the tune of a song she must've heard on the radio this morning, because it sounds familiar to me. As I finish putting my clothes on, she asks, "Are you excited to get out again?"

"Yes," I lie. "It's been a while though."

I'm really not in the mood to go outside today, especially not shopping. I'd rather wear pyjamas all day and relax with some herbal tea I found on the internet a while ago. But Zoë has been doing a lot for me these past days, so it's the least thing I can do.