Everything I Didn't Say | c.t.h

Chapter Five.

Chapter Five

It had been four weeks since Adriana had set Eleanor up on a blind date with Aaron. They had been on multiple dates since and they were now, in fact, officially in a relationship. She was happy. Happier than she had been for the past few weeks anyway. She knew no-one could make her as happy as Calum had, which probably meant she wouldn't be as happy as she was before, ever again. She pretended to be okay with it, but she wasn't. She felt bad for moving on so quickly, but she knew she had to move on at some point. She had seen multiple interviews of the 5 Seconds of Summer boys and Calum seemed to be happy, so why couldn't she?

 She kind of felt bad for Aaron. She liked him, but the problem was that she was still in love with Calum. Truth was: she was probably always going to be in love with Calum. She might not have been his, but he was her first love. She had never experienced being in love with someone until she met Calum. Of course, she had dated other guys. She liked them, to the point where she thought she was in love with them at the time, but looking back at it now she knew she hadn't been. They were the kind of boyfriends that she couldn't telling things to; her deepest secrets, her fears her hopes and dreams. In fact, there were a few secrets that even Adriana didn't know about. Calum really was the only persona that knew everything about her. She'd trusted him with her life.

Eleanor often found herself thinking about Calum, especially when she was with Aaron. She felt guilty about that, but she couldn't help it. She was constantly wondering how he was doing; if he missed her at all; if he would ever want to get back together or at least be friends. She always laughed at that thought. How could she be just friends with the guy she thought she would grow old with?

"Penny for your thoughts?" Aaron spoke, interrupting her thoughts.

"That's a weird expression, don't you think?" Eleanor asked, in attempt to change the subject. She didn't want to admit to her boyfriend that she was thinking about her ex. He knew about Calum, but what he didn't know was that she was still trying to get over him. Aaron frowned, confused at what she meant, so she continued to talk. "Why would you want to give a penny for someone's thoughts? What if the thoughts aren't worth that penny? Do you think anyone has actually even given a penny for someone else's thoughts?"

"If they did, I hope it was worth it" Aaron laughed. Eleanor smiled at his reference to her earlier comment.

They were both sat on the sofa at her house; Aaron was at one end and Eleanor had her feet on his lap while her back was resting against the arm at the other end of the sofa. "So would you tell me your thoughts if I gave you a penny?" Aaron asked.

"No" she answered, but he pulled a penny out of his pocket anyway and handed it to her. She didn't take it at first, but he gave her puppy eyes. They were her weakness, no matter who it was, she could never say no to puppy eyes. She stared at the penny, trying to figure out what to do. She couldn't tell him she was thinking about Calum, it would hurt his feelings. "I was just thinking about how I haven't played guitar in a while" she lied. Well, it wasn't a complete lie. She really hadn't played guitar in a while; it just wasn't what she was thinking about in that moment of time.

"I didn't know you played guitar?"

"Yeah, I used to post covers on YouTube. But they're non-existent now" she laughed.

"Ooh, play me something!" he clapped, getting excited. Eleanor rolled her eyes, but agreed anyway and ran upstairs to get her guitar.