semi automatic

fifteen

˗ˏˋ ★ 'ˎ˗

tyler stood up from his bed, he was determined. he was going to go to y/n's house and talk things out, as well as the other things they already needed to talk about. it had been three days since his forest filled night— which consisted of sleeping, waking up late in the day, searching for a regular job and not telling josh, and repeat. his blinds had been pulled down and shut tightly, tyler wanting not even a sliver of light to slip through. he planned on buying blackout curtains but couldn't pull himself out to go and buy them.

maybe after visiting y/n, he would go and buy the black out curtains.

walking to his closet and picking out his clothes, he ran to the bathroom. hopefully quiet enough as to not wake josh— who was passed out in his room with the door wide open. how josh is able to sleep with his door open, tyler will never understand. for him, as soon as his bedroom door closes .. the outside world does not exist. and as sad as it may sounds, he likes it that way. in his bedroom, all his problems are no more.

red haired dipshit? never heard of him.

brushing his teeth he thought of what he would say. he has no clue. all he wanted was to get down on his knees and plead— beg for her to talk to him again. hold him, touch him, anything.

he squeezed his eyes shut with a quick twitch of his head before spitting the toothpaste out. rinsing his mouth out and slipping on a new hoodie. a fresh clean one, one that josh cleaned for him when he wouldn't get out of bed. he fluffed his hair, a quick spray of josh's cologne, he was off.

jogging down to the car, he started it and immediately turned the radio on. something to drown out the ever present thoughts swirling around his brain. he drove to the coffee shop first. there's a small chance she might be here, though it is friday which she normally has off. walking into the shop, the smell of mocha coffee filled his senses. pulling the hood of his head, he walked up to the counter. a man with curly short hair came to his aide.

"hello welcome," he smiled. his tag spelling out the name taylor. "what could i get for you today?" he asked, grabbing a cup.

"hi, uhm. c-could, uh.. could i get a iced mocha coffee and an iced raspberry tea." he had no clue why he was getting her something. hell, he doesn't even know if she likes raspberry. taylor said it would be done in a few to which tyler nodded and went to sit down.

his knee bounced against his own wishes. his name was called and a breath of relief— he didn't even know he was holding, was released. grabbing the drinks, he made a beeline to his car. he gripped the steering wheel as he drove. the route was something he mesmerized like the back of his hands.

his stomach dropped when he turned onto her street. her car sat in the driveway, covered in a light layer of snow that had fallen the previous night. he thought about parking in the driveway, but decided against it. tyler parked about two houses down and took in a deep breath. in the low natural lighting of the sun starting to set, he could see her light was on.

upstairs, second room to the left.

he grabbed the drinks, which started to water down due to him sitting in the car for a few minutes. thinking. over thinking. worrying. and any other stressful adjective in the english dictionary that came to mind.

the snow crunched beneath him as he walked, something he could hear.
the scent of the wet-rain covered pavement, something he could smell.
the cups in his hands were wet due to condensation, something he could feel.
there was faint taste of iced mocha and nausea on his tongue, something he could taste.
making his way to her front door he sighed at the doorbell, something he could see.

holding his own drink to his chest, he held out his hand and pressed the doorbell. the sound of a dog barking sounded through the house. his breath caught in his throat as he heard her scold the dog.
he heard the door open and suddenly it was like time slowed.

there she was.

tyler looked down at her, his eyes widening just the slightest bit. taking her in after weeks. someone he never knew existed until about two months ago. this person had taken so much from him emotionally, mentally. it scared him a bit deep down. he had never had such a connection with someone— especially if it was a person he basically stalked and traumatized. she even said herself, he scared her.

and there was nothing more that he regretted more than that.

"hi," he whispered. he stuck out his hand, giving her the cup of raspberry tea. which he was still unsure if she even liked. he hoped she did.

"hey," she whispered back. she took the drink from his hand, inspecting it.

he squeezed his eyes shut for a few seconds, "it's raspberry," he blurted out. "i don't know if you like that or not, but i just wanted to get you something. if you don't, it's fine. you don't have to drink it."

"tyler it's fine. thank you." she responded, a small laugh escaping her. "do you want to come in?"

tyler looked up from where he was staring at his shoes. he nodded even though he hesitated to walk through fully. he stood in her leaving room as a dog circled happily around him. almost against himself, he squared down and started petting the fluffy dog, a baby like voice leaving his throat.

"his name is alf," y/n spoke from behind him.

tyler smiled as he stood back up, turning towards her. "he's adorable, though im not really a dog person, per say." he mentioned as he started to really look at her. she was in casual wear, hair messy. bed head messy, as if she had been sleeping before he got there and pulled her from a deep sleep. she liked how she looked, it was homey.

"i've missed you."

AUTHORS NOTE!
hello oh my god
finally updated
after what like almost
a year?? maybe less
i'm not sure
but holy shit yeah
anyway i hope this was okay
i'm really happy to be
back and writing again
and have a lot of plans
for the future !!
ok ily bye