No Feelings Attached (Status Series#2 Married) Completed ✔️

Kabanata 40

#NFAKab40

"That day I heard you and Jenny talking...what does it mean?"

We were laying on bed with a blanket covering our naked bodies under. Half of my body is on top of him, I am making circles on his chest while we are talking.

"I...was mad. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. Dahil ba hindi ko masyadong nasundan ang pinag-uusapan niyo...o hindi ko lang matanggap na mas may alam siya kaysa sa sakin." I sighed, confessing what I've felt that day.

"I knew it." He mumbled. "I knew you're thinking of it. That's why I immediately confronted you when we got home."

I nodded.

But then when I remembered what I did I pouted.

"But of course, you didn't tell it and just shrugged it off. I badly want to talk with you about it. Pero ano nga bang magagawa ko kung ayaw mo..." his voice was hoarse.

"So...ano na nga?" I pouted. "She hated me right? I knew it... noong sa reception ng kasal natin. Pakiramdam ko talaga non ayaw niya sakin."

He caressed my shoulder.

"I... You know was stressed from what happened." Maya maya ay aniya.

Tumingala ako at tinignan siya, nakatingin na siya sa akin at kita ko sa mata niya ang pag-aalinlangan sa sasabihin.

"Jenny's mother is a chef and his father is a psychologist. Her mother and I are business partners so I met her father. I was devastated with what happened to us...to me, sunod sunod iyon." Humina ang boses niya at parang ayaw niyang ituloy ang sasabihin dahil nag-iwas ng tingin.

Kaya naman hinawakan ko ang panga nga at iniharap sa akin.

I nodded to signal him to continue.

"O-our daughter died. My wife is depressed, and you can't even look at Lourrain that time. I... was completely messed. Lalo pa noong umalis ka." Huminga siya ng malalim.

"I-i'm sorry..." I apologize.

He cupped my face.

"No...you don't have to say sorry. It wasn't your fault hmm?" He said softly.

Nagtubig ang mata ko sa pang-aalu niya.

"I blamed you." I said in my most pain voice. "I blamed you for nothing."

He sighed before putting his forehead on mine.

"No... Stop saying sorry."

"I am such a jerk for doing that. I blamed you because I was hurt... I blamed you without knowing you're hurting too. I was so mad at you, blamed you for our loss, but I forgot that you're hurting too. I was busy crying, mourning, hurting...that I forgot you lost a child too... You want to cry, you need to mourn too." Halos mabulol bulol ako sa mga sinasabi ko.

My tears, even I am stopping myself, is falling constantly.

"Shh...stop it. I understand. Stop crying now." Mas lalo pang bumuhos ang luha ko dahil ayan na naman siya.

Naiintindihan na naman niya ako...he always understand me. Pero ako noon hindi ko man lang naunawaan na hindi naman dapat siya ang sisihin ko. Hindi ko man lang naisip na parehas kaming nasasaktan at dapat kaming dalawa ang magkasangga.

But instead I pushed him, blamed him, and left him.

"B-bakit hindi mo magawang magalit sa akin?" I pushed his chest.

Hinila niya naman ako payakap sa kanya kaya sumubsob ako sa dibdib niya.

"Bakit...hindi mo ko pagsalitaan din? Sinisi kita, dapat nagagalit ka sakin..." I urge him.