We Don't Need Memories | SakuAtsu

Chapter Seventeen

Atsumu couldn't sleep.

He tossed and turned for hours, but eventually gave up. He slowly crawled out of bed and tip-toed out of the shared bedroom.

When he reached the dark kitchen, he turned on one of the lights and dimmed it to make his way around. Atsumu looked to his left, facing the clock on the counter.

2:18 AM.

Atsumu gave a quiet groan. He didn't know if he'd be able to sleep the rest of the night. And sleep was particularly important on a night like this one, right before early morning practice.

He stood and opened up one of the overhead cabinets, pulling out a single glass. The cool water from the faucet felt good on his hand as he tested the temperature. When the cup was filled up, he held the glass to his lips and took a few sips of the cool liquid.

Atsumu set the cup down on the counter behind him as he heard a sound down the dark hallways he had come from. Squinting his eyes, Atsumu was able to make out a figure walking towards him. A small feeling of regret filled his body as he saw that Kiyoomi was also awake now.

"What are you doing up this early?" Kiyoomi asked, entering the kitchen with his eyes squinted in hopes of adjusting to the dim light of the kitchen. When he was able to open his eyes fully, Kiyoomi walked closer to Atsumu.

"I couldn't sleep," Atsumu shrugged, picking back up his glass of water to take a sip. "I didn't mean to wake you."

Kiyoomi laughed. "You didn't wake me, don't worry."

Atsumu nodded, slightly relieved. "Well, if I didn't wake you then why are you up?"

"I tried to put my arm around you and you weren't there," Atsumu let out a small chuckle at Kiyoomi's words. Yawning, Atsumu leaned into Kiyoomi's torso. "But now I can." Kiyoomi wrapped his arms around Atsumu's back. "C'mon."

Atsumu bobbed his head, allowing Kiyoomi to lead him back to the room.

~~~

Atsumu's funeral was anything but extravagant.

It was a closed-casket funeral, one of Atsumu's last requests before he passed. According to Osamu, his exact words had been: "The last memory my friends and family will have of me will not be of my dead body."

Only the closest relatives were invited to attend the funeral, including Atsumu's MSBY teammates. There wasn't a dry eye throughout the venue as the ceremony proceeded.

Kiyoomi included.

He stayed toward the back of the crowd, scared that if he got too close to people, he wouldn't be able to hold back his tears. He hadn't been able to talk about Atsumu without crying since he died, and Kiyoomi wasn't sure it would ever change.

A numb feeling was what Kiyoomi would have described how he felt the majority of the day. He felt unwelcomed. Out of place.

He was in his head to the point where he didn't realize that Atsumu's mother had made her way over to Kiyoomi.

"Kiyoomi-San?" Kiyoomi could hear the tears thick in the voice of Atsumu's mother as he turned to face the brunette. Her face was blotched with color, eyes rimmed red from crying.

Kiyoomi wiped a tear off of his face and bowed his head to the woman in front of him. "Miya-San."

"Do you mind if we talk for a few minutes?" The woman in front of Kiyoomi asked, gesturing to the bench that happened to be next to them. Kiyoomi nodded, sitting down next to Atsumu's mother.

"I wouldn't expect you to know this, but the day Atsumu came back from that training camp back in High School, you were the first person he told us about," Atsumu's mother kept her eyes forward on the small hill in front of them. Flowers bloomed from all sides of the mound, providing a beautiful scene for any eyes. But even with the sight in front of him, Kiyoomi made sure to listen to every word the woman next to him said. "In fact, you were one of the only people he talked about."

Kiyoomi stayed silent as Atsumu's mother made a sound beside him. Kiyoomi couldn't decide if it was a sob or a laugh, so he concluded with a mix of both.

"It was almost as if his passion for the sport had grown after meeting you. He would always talk about how he hoped to be a setter for you one day, and the day he found out you were on the team he was," She took a second to take a deep breath. "He practically screamed into the phone how excited he was."

Kiyoomi couldn't help the half-sob, half-chuckle, that escaped his lips.

Of course, he would have done something like that.

"He called us a few days after he was diagnosed, but while his father and I were worried about what the outcome would be, Atsumu was simply worried about you."

Kiyoomi looked down at his hands that were clasped together in his lap.

He hadn't known any of this.

Kiyoomi waited a few more moments to see if Atsumu's mother would speak again, but when she didn't, Kiyoomi decided to say something.

"I made a promise to myself when we first started dating," Kiyoomi swallowed hard, trying to unlodge the lump in his throat. "A promise that I would protect him through whatever happened."

Kiyoomi couldn't remember if he had ever talked to Atsumu's mother like this. Sure, he went to meet his entire family when they originally started dating, but by that time they were already playing for MSBY. They were hardly home anymore.

"And you did exactly that, Kiyoomi-San. No one could have predicted something like this to happen," Atsumu's mother put a hand on Kiyoomi's shoulder. "This is undoubtedly hard for everyone, but I know that these events will affect you the most. Atsumu knew you would react exactly this way if things turned out the way they did."

Wiping tears from his eyes, Kiyoomi looked up from his lap to face the setting sun behind the distant hill.

They continued to talk for a few moments more, before Atsumu's mother was called away to speak with another relative.

But she hadn't left Kiyoomi completely alone on that small bench under the trees. She had left him with a single piece of knowledge, one that Kiyoomi knew he would carry with him for the rest of his life.

While the light that had been welcomed into Kiyoomi's life was now faded, Kiyoomi knew that one day, eventually, he would find a spark of light again. He didn't know how or where he would discover a new piece of hope, all he knew was that it had to be there. Somewhere.

Just as Atsumu's mother had stated every so hopefully, speaking not only for Kiyoomi's mourning state but for anyone else's as well.

When the Sun sets, it may appear as though the light is gone. But what you must remember is that with patience, it will rise again, brighter in the new day.