meant to be | seongsang (✓)

☆.｡.:* 3.1 .｡.:*☆

yeosang spent two days back in their apartment, and both boys had now noticed the air felt a bit different between them. it was a terrifying feeling, one that had seonghwa itching to vent to someone, but he didn't want to leave yeosang's side in fear that the boy would disappear.

after a couple of days, yeosang announced that he was going to stay with wooyoung for a night, explaining how the younger had begged him to come over because san had a later shift and the boy didn't want to "die of boredom". seonghwa chuckled at this, nodding and pressing a soft kiss to yeosang's forehead before letting the boy pack his backpack.

within the next hour or so, yeosang was at wooyoung's, cuddled into the boy's arms with a pout on his face.

"i don't want to leave him, woo..."

"i know, bubba... i know..."

"a-all i know is life with him, w-what am i supposed to do?"

"sang... you just spent three weeks living without him. you can do it, yeah? i'll be right by your side through it all."

"i'm so, so scared," yeosang whimpered.

"do you want me to call jjong? maybe talking to him will help..."

"no... no, i just want you, youngie... n-no one else will be able to help..."

"okay... okay, i'm here, sangie. i'll always be right here."

yeosang nuzzled his face into wooyoung's chest, the younger gently stroking his hair to help relax him.

"thank you, youngie..."

wooyoung hummed in response, holding yeosang close as he put a movie on for the two to watch.

by the end of the movie, yeosang had fallen asleep, clinging to wooyoung and leaving him with a soft frown on his face. he felt awful for his best friend, for the pain he was feeling after realizing that he no longer felt the same about the boy he once thought he would spend forever with.

meanwhile, back in their apartment, seonghwa sat staring at the wall blankly while hongjoong was ranting about god knows what. seonghwa couldn't focus though, his mind was on yeosang. yeosang and their broken relationship.

he felt lost, unsure of what to do, so he had invited hongjoong over in hopes that the boy would provide him with some comfort, only to be proven wrong. seonghwa felt numb. hongjoong couldn't fix that.

"hongjoong," seonghwa whispered, hoping he would catch the boy's attention.

the younger quickly got quiet, looking over at seonghwa and tilting his head. seonghwa felt his heart flutter slightly at the action, but then felt tears welling in his eyes.

"i can't do this anymore, joong..."

"hwa... hey, it's going to be okay... you and yeosang will be okay."

"how are you so sure?"

"you've always made it before, i don't see how this is any different."

"y-you don't get it... this is different, joong. i spent three weeks not knowing if he was ever coming back. three weeks wallowing in self hatred and drowning myself in drugs and alcohol. i fucking cheated on him... a-and i didn't feel any regret. he cheated on me too... this is so messed up, hongjoong. i'm scared, i'm really, really scared."

"seonghwa..." hongjoong said softly, crawling closer to the older and gently rubbing his back. "you're okay... i'm here, yeah? you can vent about anything, i won't leave."

"i thought i was going to spend forever with him, hongjoong. i thought we were meant to be."

"sometimes people are meant to be but not built to last, hwa... it's a very sad, unfortunate truth."

"d-do you think that's us? yeosang and i, o-our relationship?"

"i don't know... i don't know your relationship like that. i spent too much time distancing myself from the two of you to know."

"i'm so fucking scared, joong..."

"hey... hey, that's okay... shhh..."

hongjoong spent the next few minutes calming the older down, gently wiping the boy's tears away in the process.

"no matter what happens, hwa... i'm here. i don't care about my feelings for you... you're my best friend. and friends come first."

"t-thank you..."

"and i believe yeosang's always going to love you, no matter what ends up happening between the two of you. you've done so much for him and been a huge source of strength for him these past few years. you got him through his parents' passing, and i think he'll always love you for that, among the other amazing things you've done for him."

"i-i needed to hear that..."

"you're so loved, seonghwa. as a friend, as a lover... please don't let anything convince you otherwise."

seonghwa sighed and cuddled into hongjoong's embrace, sniffling as he tried to calm himself down. hongjoong just rubbed the boy's back, keeping him grounded.

"hey... hwa?"

"hm?"

"i'm gonna have to get going soon... i have a shift at the restaurant. are you going to be okay?"

"i— i-i don't know..."

"okay... i'll keep my ringer on in case you need me, sound good?"

seonghwa hummed slightly and nodded, then hongjoong pressed a kiss to the boy's temple.

"okay," hongjoong whispered, hugging him warmly. "i've got you..."

seonghwa and hongjoong spent the next twenty minutes before hongjoong had to leave cuddled up on the couch, seonghwa doing everything in his power to calm down.

"you're sure you'll be okay?"

"mhmm... if i need you, i'll call... i promise."

hongjoong smiled small, nodding, then left the apartment with a quick "see you soon". seonghwa still felt empty, even more so now than when hongjoong was beside him.

and that was when it hit him, he was the one who didn't know how to function without yeosang. yeosang would be fine without him. and the thought of this could have killed him.

he was more scared now than he ever was before.

~
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