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14.

"Son, Ceres isn't yours anymore, do you really think after everything you've both been through, everything you've put him through, he actually still has love for you, that man loved you child, —I fear he doesn't anymore and it's best for everyone that you accept that." My mother spoke sadly as we sat in the lounge, I was feeling better after she had found a way to cure me of my allergies and reactions. It was no small feat since it had been severe and all throughout the process, the only one I was thinking of was Ceres, he would've known how to stop the reaction or better yet prevent it.

It made me sad and hurt thinking of how I had single handedly hurt him to the extent that even my mother couldn't get through to him, I knew if I got close to him with any of his brothers around, it would be trouble for me, but I couldn't help hope that he would want me back too, that he would atleast forgive me and I tried to win him back. "I can't just accept that mom, I can't give up without trying, I know I hurt him, broke his heart, divorced him, God knows I've been a true nightmare to him but I know I still love him mom, he's the other father of my kids, I miss them so much, Klein is all grown up now and I'm not in his life, some other man is teaching him how to ride a bike, how to fix a tyre, all the things I should be doing, —and Lola, she's probably talking more now and she's not calling me papa, I can't take that mom." And in that outburst it led to me breaking down in tears.

I knew I had destroyed the perfect life all because of ambition, greed and living a lie, I wanted more than what I had, Ceres was always grateful for what he had, aside from having everything as a child he was still the kindest soul you'd ever meet and that's one of the things that had me falling for him, its what gave me the determination to atleast try reach out. "Mom, I —I can't fix this, I can't fix anything without him." I cried holding on to my mother who comforted me. "I wish I could do more son, but the only thing I can say is be brave enough to walk through the flames you began and fanned into a raging fire, this is your bed, either lay in it or try fix it." She comforted wiping away my tears and I nodded, she was right, I would do whatever it took to get him back, whatever it took to fix everything.

Drake Will.

"Ah, could you at least pretend that you're being gentle." I grumbled toward Craig who was helping me onto the couch after my doctor made his diagnosis and ruled out any possible broken bones except my broken nose. "Sorry but I did tell you that we needed to leave, the moment that monster of a man showed up you were dead meat." He reprimanded as I hissed resting on my bruised ribs, Hugh in all honesty could have killed me, I was lucky to even have him hold back the way he did, and by holding back I meant I was given several bruised ribs, my face was a puzzle of black eyes, a broken nose, cut lips and several cuts at the back of my neck, all in all I also had a concussion, indeed that man had no remorse or forgiveness for what I did to Ceres.

"I wasn't going to run, it would just prove that I am a coward and I would walk away easily, getting to Ceres isn't the problem, its getting past his brothers, you know how they are." I told him, though my ego was shattered and my bravado left in tatters I wasn't giving up, I was determined to have my husband and my children back, I had hurt them I knew that but I wasn't going to give in so easily and let them walk away without a fight. "You do know Hugh will easily put a bullet in your skull right, or Tyrell behead you, or Peyton have Kol put you in a hole somewhere and throw away the hole right?" Craig pressed on making me groan. "Man if you're not going to be any help to me just go alright, —I don't need your brand of pessimism right now, I am definitely concust because I got my ass handed to me so please." I asserted as he sighed and poured me a glass of scotch that I definitely needed.

"I'm sorry okay, but someone needs to tell you the truth, whatever happened today if there is a repeat, you know you'll die, so I suggest you change your strategy or otherwise —I don't even want to think about it." He added and I nodded knowing he was right, I just couldn't walk up to Ceres anymore, he was a different person now, he was fuckin' gorgeous. "But man your ex husband literally had an upgrade, I don't remember him ever looking that fine, he's gorgeous now, —dumping your ass really got him to another level." Craig comments on my thoughts exactly and I couldn't help sneer at the last bit but also agree. Ceres had definitely gone through a beautiful metamorphosis. "Yeah, he looks breathtaking." I mumble smiling into my glass.

"Something is buggin' me though, I thought he would be angry, lash out or something, he just smiled, what's up with that, he treated you as if you were just any man he once knew, he was smiling but it was cold especially toward someone you had kids with." This was now becoming a little annoying but Craig had the same thoughts over his reaction toward me that I had. "He refused to meet me when I wanted to see the kids and when I ambush him, he seems completely neutral like nothing happened, I thought it was odd too, maybe he was trying not to seem affected but I know Ceres, he's different, normally he would've done anything to get out of there but he just treated me like any other person, it felt cold and it stung, —maybe my mother was right, he's not mine anymore." I stated as Craig poured me another glass.

"You can't cave in now man, I thought you were determined to win him back, what's this?" My friend demanded and I snicker, he was the one reprimanding me about my actions just now, —here he was now cheering me on, he seriously couldn't make up his own mind. "I thought you wanted me to stop and not go forward with anything." I argued and he nodded. "I would rather you just try be in the kid's lives, when it comes to Ceres you might hit a dead end or realize he's moved on, —I don't know, I just can't stand seeing you broken all over again, but if you're sure you can do this, — as your friend, I'll support you man." He concluded and I couldn't be more grateful for him as my friend, despite his lack of a filter over his words, I appreciated him because I would rather hear the truth than what I wanted to hear which was probably wrong.

"Thanks Craig, and hey if he shoots me down, you'll probably have a chance." I joked and it was his turn to snicker and laugh. "In as much as I want to delude myself like that, Ceres is now way out of my league and besides I've got my eye on someone else, —Derek Steven, bumped into him when I was digging around for where Ceres would be and I tell you, he's definitely going to be hearing from me." He proudly boasted making me laugh. "Anyone in Ceres's circle is bound to shoot you down at this point good luck." I sarcastically quipped making both of us laugh. "Eh, it's worth a try, if I shoot my shot, I'll just hope it hits, if it doesn't I'll just shoot more shots until it hits." He exclaimed as we laughed again, the alcohol making my pain numb and turning everything into amusing statements. "No backing down!" I called out. "Aye!" Craig cheered on as our glasses clanked to our toast.

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