not good enough

chapter 7

"How are you mad at me right now? You wanted me to take advantage of you when you're drunk and vulnerable?" I say, following her as she storms downstairs.

"Yes! Obviously yes! Otherwise I wouldn't have come here" she says. "You're a fucking bitch" I say.

"What?" She turns around. "You heard me.. you're a rude, selfish, inconsiderate asshole" I say.

"How am I an asshole!? I literally offered my virginity to you! That's all you've wanted since forever" she says. "No, It isn't" I say.

She rolls her eyes, chuckling. "I want to love you.. and be with you" I put my hands on her cheeks. She sighs. "I don't want a pity fuck when you're drunk" I say.

"It wasn't a pity fuck.. I was just horny and thought you were an easy fuck" she pulls my hands away. "Meredith" I say shocked and hurt. "But apparently you don't have the balls" she slams the door behind her as she leaves.

Merediths pov:
The next day I walk into school feeling so guilty about yesterday. I don't even know why I said it. I was just embarrassed and took it out on him. I Need to apologise.

I see Mark. "Hey, you seen derek anywhere?" I ask. "Umm.. the field I think" he says. "Thanks" I say.

I go outside to the field. I smile as I see him playing football. He sees me. I smile small, waving at him. He runs over.

I sit down on a bench. He sits next to me. "Derek, I'm sorry" I look down. He doesn't say anything. "I didn't mean anything I said.. I was just embarrassed that you turned me down last night" I say.

"You shouldn't be embarrassed.. I respect you meredith, so much.. I'd never take advantage of you to fulfil my own needs when I know that's not what you want" he puts his hands on my neck, stroking my jaw with his thumbs.

"I'm really sorry" I say. "I know" he whispers, smiling small. He kisses me. I let him. I don't mind him kissing me, at all. Its nice.

He pulls away slowly. "I'm sorry" he shakes his head. "No, its okay" I smile, kissing him again.

I pull away slowly. He smiles. "Um.. I'm sorry for flashing you yesterday" I blush. "That's very much okay" he says. I giggle.

He puts his hand on my cheek, stroking it gently with his thumb. "You're so beautiful" he says. I smile. "You really think so?" I ask. "Definitely" he says.

"Why did you come to my house last night?" He asks. I sigh. "Oh, I don't know.. I-I just knew that you'd take care of me if I went there.. I didn't want to go home for my mom to scream at me.. you're just-" I stop.

"What?" He asks. "I guess you make me feel safe" I whisper. He smiles. "I'm glad" he says.

"I'd never actually just use you for your body like that derek.. last night I was horrible and ugh.. I'm just sorry" I say. "I know" he says.

"But just to be clear.. you're hot and the size was very unexpected and.. wow" I get up, kissing his head before walking away quickly. I hear him laughing. I smile, walking back into school to go to class.