not good enough

chapter 8

I'm at school, sat on the bleachers talking to cristina. "Hey" Derek walks over. "Hey" I smile. "You look beautiful" he sits next to me. "Thankyou" I smile at him.

"What's going on?" He signals towards Joshua, who I'm paying no attention to. "I don't like him anymore" I say. "Good" he says. I roll my eyes, smiling.

"Why?" He asks. "He's an asshole" I sigh. "Told you" he says. I scoff. "Sorry" He says. I smile small. "What did he do? Did he hurt you or-" he asks. "Of course not" I say.

"What did he do?" He asks. I stand up. I hold out my hand. He takes it and follows me to somewhere a bit more private on the field.

"You can't freak out.. or tell anyone" I say. "Okay" he says. "When we went out the other day, we started kissing and he started pulling on my clothes.. trying to take them off" I say.

His face fills with anger and jealously. "But I told him to stop.. because I'm not ready" I say quietly. He looks calmer.

"And he started yelling at me and told me I'm wasting his time" I say. "What?" His face fills with pure rage. "And I started crying.. because I was scared and hurt and-" I tear up.

He walks past me. "No, derek please don't" I pull him back. I hug him. He pulls me into his arms.

"He's an asshole.. I'll fucking kill him" he says. "Don't do anything" I say. "Mer" he says.

"I told you this in confidence, derek.. if you do anything then I know not to trust you again" I say. He sighs. "Okay" he says.

"I won't do anything, but I swear to god I will never forgive you if you talk to him again.. he deserves to be nowhere near you" he says. "I'm not going to talk to him again" I say.

"Are you mad at me? For not listening to you" I ask. "Of course I'm not baby, it's not your fault" he says. "I just didn't think he'd be an asshole like that.. I-I thought that he was different" I say tearfully.

Derek's pov:
She's still crying. "I don't want any boys anymore at all" she hugs me. I smile small. I know that shouldn't make me happy but I kinda am. It really limits my competition.

"No boys?" I ask. "Only you" she sniffles. I hug her tighter. I kiss her head. "I love you" I say. "I love you too" she says.

She pulls away from me. "Can we have a sleepover at yours tonight?" She asks. "Yeah, whatever you want" I say. She smiles.

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We're in my bed in our pyjamas. she's just wearing my shirt. "You were ready to have sex with me?" I say quietly. "I love you. You're my best friend" she says.

"So? You liked him" I say. "Its different with you.. I feel safe with you" she says. "Good" I say.

"Your girlfriend would be the luckiest girl alive" she says. "You will be" I say. She giggles.

"Why won't you just date me? You love me and we kiss all the time anyway.. we don't have to have sex, just let me win you over" I say. She sighs.

"Please" I say. "I.." she wraps her arms around my neck. I put my hands on her waist.

"I will be your girlfriend for a month.. you have that time to-" she says. "Make you fall in love with me" I say. She smiles small, nodding.

"So I can kiss you and-" I ask. "Everything a boyfriend and girlfriend do apart from sex" she says.

I lean in. "Do you agree to the terms?" She moves back. "Yes yes yes" I say, desperate to just kiss her already. She giggles. She let's me.

I can tell she likes kissing me from the way her body reacts to it. She just doesn't want to like it. I'll make her like it..