Joy's POV
"What's happening here?" I heard someone spoke, right in front of the open door. They are still here?! I walk to Seulgi unnie and grabbed her.
"What happened last night, unnie?" I frustratingly asked. Honestly? I don't understand any of this now and I just want to know what really happened, before I lose my shit already!
"Yah! Sooyoung-ah... Can you calm down for a moment?" She said shaking off my tight hold on her arms. CALM DOWN?! I tried my best to be calm earlier, but this thing needs clarifications already.
"Unnie! I just slept with Wendy!" I said sternly. "and I don't even know how it happened, or did something really happened! That's why I need you to tell me what happened last night." I saw a shocked expression formed on her face. She looked behind me, where I assumed Wendy is now.
"Y-you two what?!" this time she successfully removed my hands. "How did this happened?!" She shouted at the both of us. How did that question comeback to me? "Joy! You have a boyfriend!" she looked at me in disbelief and disappointment, a look that she also give Wendy. "And Wendy, you're--"
"I know! I know that!" Wendy cut off Seulgi unnie.
"Then why did you let this happened?!" Seulgi unnie looks like she's scolding Wendy. When I turn to look at Wendy again. She's still as troubled as she was, earlier.
"I don't even know what happened!" She raised her voice. "I just woke up naked with a naked Joy!"
"It's okay!" Seulgi unnie suddenly clap. It startled me. "It was just a drunken mistake. Both of you were drunk and caught in the moment. No feelings attached. Everything is fine, not a big deal." It's seem like she's trying to convince her own self. "Right Wendy?" She looks at Wendy with a worried expression now.
With just that, I know there was something more to Wendy's reaction. I still don't know what it is, but surely unnie knows.
"No one's hiding this to their partner, okay?" She look at me then Wendy again. Is Wendy? "They deserve to know, whether it might hurt them or not, you two hear me?" She is. I look at her, she nodded to Seulgi unnie.
She's in a relationship.
Who is she with?
Do I know this person?
Does this person make her happy? What am I saying!? Of course she'll be happy.
Why didn't she tell me?
That's why she reacted that way! 'I cheated with you' I should've known! but why did she say it like the problem was who she did it with and not that she had done it?
"Do you despise me that much, Wendy?" I remove myself from my own thoughts and decided to question her already.
I've had enough! Did she even considered me as her friend? Our eyes meet.
"I know you didn't really see me as one of the people you trust, I was hoping that you could at least acknowledge me as a friend."
"Joy-ah" I felt Seulgi unnie's hand on my shoulder.
"No, unnie." I took a deep breath. "Do you all not see it?" I wipe the tears that' starting to fall from my eyes already. "Well, I guess you really don't pay that much attention to me. Sometimes I even wonder if I'm really part of this group. All of you seemed so close to each other. You guys notice every little thing about each other, but none of you really notice how much of a mess I really am."
"That's not true, Soo--"
"But it is unnie! You only notice things about me when you know I'm about to burst out something that can form a huge impact in the group, and I get it! You only want to protect this friendship. I'm not asking for a lot of attention, maybe just a little? Just so I can feel like I really have someone, because honestly speaking? I have no one in this group, and the only person who I thought understood me so well in the past, she hates me now!" I said those staring straight to her. "Do you all even wonder how my life was after Wendy left? because you all seemed to have told your stories to each other already. Well, good for you guys!"
"Hey! We heard shouts from out--" Yeri
"Why is Joy crying?!" Irene unnie cut her off.
"Great! You guys are here! Come! I'm was just about to start my story telling!" I signaled them join us and give them a forced smile. I saw how Yerim and Irene unnie give Wendy and Seulgi questioning looks. "Maybe this time you could listen to me?" give all of them a glance.
"Unnie, what are you saying?" Yerim.
"Kim Yerim! Remember when Wendy left and you suddenly started ignoring me?"
"Sooyoung-ah, stop." Seulgi unnie said. I chuckled before looking to Yeri seriously.
"You know how much I questioned myself that time? That maybe, I was really the problem because she's okay with Seulgi unnie, with Irene unnie, it was just with me. And do you remember what you old me that time when I asked you about it, Seulgi unnie?" This time I face her. "'Give her time, she'll get over it' well, guess what? You were right! She got over it, after almost 2 years. No! it's exactly after two years, since she had only been okay being around me just recently."
"Mianhe, unnie" Yerim said, looking down.
"You know what hurts more? It's the fact that the moment Wendy left, it's like all of you guys left with her. We seldom meet each other. Yeri hated me. Seulgi and Irene unnie became more busy. To hell! even Sungjae broke up with me!" They all looked at me in shock. "It was also the time Dad left me with no choice but to take over the company, because how is he still going to do that when he's literally dying already?" I forced a laugh. "and all I hear from my mom were apologies! At that time, I wished it will all just stop. The pain. The longing. The pressure." It's still there
"So, you see! My life have been that one rollercoaster ride! A story worth listening to and yet none of you were willing to listen. Not one of you were there! And unnie..." I look at Seulgi unnie. "You can't blame for desperately asking answers from Wendy, that all of you seemed to know already but refuse to tell me. Why?! Can the reason hurt me the way I was already hurt? Will it cause me more pain than what I've already experience?"
"It's not that Joy." Wendy speak up.
"Then what is it Wendy!? It was because of me right? Because why would Yeri blame me, if it wasn't." Wendy just stayed silent. I scoff. "Just what I thought" I said in defeat. I guess she's never gonna tell me. "About whatever happened to us last night, just like what Seulgi unnie said not a big deal. You can just forget it! Like a nightmare? I'm sure you'd prefer to think of it that way, since it involves me. For all I know, you just hated my guts before, that's why you left." Just when I finished talking my phone vibrated. I look at it. I'm really sorry Crush, but I guess I'm still that affected by her, you deserve to know the truth. I fixed myself and look at all of them. "I have to go. Feel free to invite me again, girls. I still have a lot of stories to tell." I smiled at them. I can't believe I just told them those things.
I was about to go out already when Wendy speak up again, I was not shocked that's why I stopped. I stopped because it all come back to me with just those words she expresses.
"I was in love with you Joy! You--" I stopped her before she could even say more, that will only make me beg for it to be todays truth and not just the past's.
"I wish you could've just stayed, if it was really your reason for leaving." I give her a forced smile. As soon as I turn my back on them I felt my tears falling. I know it's too late now.
Right now? I wish Crush would not do what Sungjae did after I told him what my real feelings were. I can't afford to lose him, not when I just had that conversation with them. I can understand if ever he'll do the same, but I wish he will not do it too soon. I have no one anymore.
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I Cheated with You. | WENJOY
FanfictionI Cheated with You. A story of a person who still haven't moved on from the past, but chose to live like she already did.
