Amile The Queen

Chapter Ninety

***Amile Gumede***

I was already dressed, waiting to call Mgabadeli to bring the car around so he can drive me to the hospital when I walked into Shlobo wheeling in baba with Mandlenkosi in tow.
“What are you guys doing here?” baba looks weak, like he could faint at any moment.
My mind tracks back to Mhlabawesizwe’s words in the dream. He clearly specified that hospitals won’t help baba in any way. Is that why he called Shlobo?
“He needs to be here.” Shlobo reports.
I’m going to be ignorant about what I already know and fight.
“He looks like he might topple over and die right here, what do you mean he needs to be here!? He has heart problems, he needs a hospital, he needs bypass surgery!” I hate Mhlabawesizwe with my whole heart.
I turn to look at Mandlenkosi, and he looks just as defeated as I do.
“Is the throne room open?” Did she even hear what I said? She asked as she pushed the wheelchair.
I didn’t even have the energy to answer her. I watched them as they disappeared down the corridor to the throne room. I turned back to look at Mandlenkosi.
“I tried talking her out of it, she didn’t want to listen.” I sigh and just grab the bags from him.
I make my way to our bedroom, drop off his bags and head back downstairs. I’ll sort out his clothes later, he barely even used them I’m sure, he didn’t even spend a day. I’m sure Dr Mhlongo is fuming mad wherever he is. This is absurd, and I feel even guiltier for knowing that he is supposed to be here.
I let myself into the throne room and baba is sitting on the floor, his legs stretched out, and his head is hanging. I really don’t believe Shlobo should have taken him out of the hospital.
“I don’t think he’s okay.” I say rushing to where he is.
I can’t even kneel to I can inspect him.
“He is okay. The doctor said it himself, his heart is fine, it’s nothing medical happening to him.” it’s going to take a lot to convince me of that.
But maybe that is the reason why I had pains while he was experiencing them that morning. Maybe it wasn’t a heart attack.
“Baba how are you feeling?” I ask brushing his shoulder.
No response. He looks like a zombie.
“What did you do to him?” I ask with my voice breaking.
“He’s on the other side, not here. That’s why he won’t hear nor respond to anything we say.”
“What other side are you talking about? Is he dead?” I say as I catch the tears falling out of my eyes with my thumb.
“No, he’s not dead. He just needs to sit here with his ancestors.” she says and puts her arm around my neck.
“Come, let’s go.” she leads me out.
I keep looking back, he’s not moving, he’s just sitting still, looking lifeless. I didn’t leave him like this back at the hospital.
When we get to the lounge, we are met with that woman from last night at the hospital. She has bags by her feet, I can’t help but wonder…
“Where is my son?” she asks as soon as she looks at me.
I could be rude and return the favour, but I’m not bitter, it’s too early in the morning.
“Who is your son and where did you leave him?” I ask staring right at her.
She’s old enough to be my grandmothers age, you can’t miss the wrinkles under her eyes. But even with those wrinkles you can tell she used to be beautiful back in her times.
Wait a damn minute…
“Are you supposed to be the wife?” oh my goodness.
I’m not the wife, I’m his wife.
“Yes, I’m Langalethu’s wife.” first and last time I will ever say his name like that.
She’s scanning me up and down. Even a blind man can tell that she doesn’t like me. Problem is, I’m really not shaken.
“Why did I arrive at the hospital and was sent back because they said my son was discharged? How does that happen, he hasn’t healed!?” I turned to look at Shlobo who is just zoning out.
I know better than to try and talk her out of it, she won’t hear a word, she’s not here.
“The hospital won’t help him.” I say to the woman who claims to have a son in my husband.
“And what do you know? You aren’t a doctor, you barely look like you finished school.” she’s fuming mad.
Problem is again, I really am not shaken.
“At the end of the day gogo, he’s here, and he’s not going to go anywhere because the help he needs is right here. Now if you will excuse me, I need to go take care of a few things.” I say before grabbing Shlobo’s hand and drag her with me to the office.
She’ll snap out of it.
I can hear her ranting to whoever is out there with her. It’s probably Mandlenkosi.
“This girl is not right to be queen!” and she all of a sudden knows me better than the rest of the world.
I really do not want to entertain her nonsense because I know very well that kaMhlaba will take my side any day, especially over a woman who hasn’t been there for him in his hardest moments. It’s not like the world wasn’t aware that he was alive, he’s been crowned king of Zululand for goodness sake, and he’s been on the throne for almost a year now. She has no excuse whatsoever. She hasn’t been bottom line, she has very little rights to be here claiming him.
“MaMfusi.” I call out, leaning on the door after taking a deep breath.
“That woman is not supposed to be here.” she says in a panic.
“Is she here to ruin things?” I ask standing up right.
Now I’m concerned. Why are things suddenly going sideways, just yesterday our lives were peaceful.
“She needs to go.” I don’t think that is our decision to make.
I know if I had the choice I would be the one to gladly escort her out the premises, but baba might not be happy about it.
“What is happening with baba? Is he okay?” I say moving swiftly along from the mommy issue.
“He needs to perform a ceremony for Vukani…” you know I’m really starting to think that Mhlabawesizwe doesn’t use his powers correctly.
“How the hell is he going to perform a ceremony for Vukani when he can’t even stand on his own?”
“This is bigger than you MaGumede, I’d advise you to stay out of it.” she warns.
Her face is straight, that gives me enough reason to stop questioning her. But why Vukani only, and not the other boys?
“Does this have anything to do with MaMzobe?” she doesn’t answer me.
Instead, she asks to be let out of the door and I gladly do so. There is no use keeping her in here knowing very well she won’t tell me a single thing.
Why Mhlabawesizwe why!? I thought you were on my side.
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I didn’t bother myself with going to the throne room for the rest of the day, I let them do whatever they needed to do, as long as my husband is alive and well.
I forced myself into the kitchen and cooked up a storm, I haven’t cooked in a long time, and that was my form of therapy. I’m sitting on a bench in the kitchen waiting for my water to boil. I’m staring up at the television and when I see my face popping up on the screen, I ask the helpers to turn up the volume.
“Sources have confirmed that the king of Zululand was indeed admitted in hospital after a short illness. It has not yet been confirmed what the illness is, but we wish our monarch a speedy recovery. In other royal news, the Queen uNdlunkulu MaGumede is expecting the king’s first child. She was spotted outside the hospital rocking her baby bump. It is the first time in royal history that a queen or a female member of the royal family has ever been spotted pregnant. Could this mark the end of an era?”
“Switch it off please.” I say to the helpers.
End of an era my left foot, they were invading my privacy. I can’t even get air in private, I’ll obviously end up splashed on all news platforms. And how the hell did they know baba was the one admitted? I’ve let down all those queens and princesses who have worked so hard to keep their pregnancies a secret. To think I was doing so well.
I stand up and go attend to my pots. Just as I am stirring my curry, Shlobo walks into the kitchen.
“I’ve been looking for you all around, Zulu is asking for you.” my heart leaped.
“He’s up?” I dropped everything in my hands.
“Yes, and he’s been waiting for you so hurry.”
I didn’t even think twice, I followed her out of the kitchen. He was sitting in the throne room, sitting on his throne, with his hands covering his face. He looks stressed, or exhausted, I can’t really tell.
I go kneel at the alter, lower my head and praise him.
“Bayede! Zulu ka Malandela ngokulandela izinkomo zamadoda!”
“Phakama mkami uze sizokhuluma.” my heart started racing at the seriousness of his voice.
Now I’m seriously worried, and I can feel my insides trembling as I climb the stairs to find my seat next to his.
“Let me excuse you.” Shlobo said before she walked out the room.
We were left alone in a thick silence, you could literally cut through it with a knife. He turned around in his seat and faced me before taking my hands and squeezing them. He looks guilty about something.
“How are you feeling?” I asked him.
His eyes softened up and he gave me that look of love he always gives me when we make love. I love this man with my whole heart.
“I’m feeling better, I just needed to be home, that’s all.” he confesses.
I’m glad that’s the case, he looks better. I just wish he could just get rid of that guilty look he’s wearing.
“Why are you wearing an apron?” he asks wearing a smirk.
“I was doing my wifely duties today and cooked.”
“Ngathi uyazi ukuthi akuve ngilambile, I can’t wait to taste your food.” I blushed.
“I wanted to talk to you about what is happening here at the palace, so you can advise me on a few things, as the the Queen of Zululand, and my wife.”
“Okay.” I say, feeling very unsure.
He took a deep breath in before he opened his eyes and looked at me.
“So you do know that years ago, before Zwelibanzi married Nontuthuzelo, that she used to be my girlfriend.” I retracted my one hand from his hold.
He didn’t fight me about it. My body temperature is rising. I didn’t know this, he never told me!?
Why is this giving my entanglement with Banzi and Mandlenkosi?
“I had asked her to marry me and she had agreed, but I didn’t know that she was dating and in love with Zwelibanzi, and not me.” I’m still trying to figure out what this has to do with me.
“When I told her I didn’t want to take the throne like I was supposed to, she broke up with me and accepted my brother’s proposal instead. Zwelibanzi didn’t know about this, and till his last day he didn’t know that the woman he married was supposed to be my wife.” he took a deep breath.
“Baba I don’t unders…”
“I’m telling you all of this so you don’t crucify me for what I’m going to tell you next.”
“She was sleeping with the both of us at the same time, and she ended up falling pregnant with Vukani. Nothing occurred to me then that it might have been my son too, because she was sure that it was Zwelibanzi’s child. Shortly thereafter they got married and Vukani was born into wedlock, therefore he was considered Zwelibanzi’s son, per terms of marriage, and Zulu blood.”
“But?” I asked raising my eyebrow.
Tears are already burning my eyes.
“He’s my son.” he says, failing to maintain eye contact with me.
His voice is barely audible.
I have no reason to be mad at him, or the situation, he didn’t know me then, he owes me nothing.
“I didn’t know until that night you found me in the bathroom.” he’s been keeping something this big from me?
“I didn’t know how to tell you mkami.” the tears involuntarily fall from my eyes.
“Ngiyaxolisa.” I cover my face with my hands and sob.
I can’t control myself. I can’t help it, my heart is hurting. More than anything I’m angry at MaMzobe for making all of us fools for so long. For Banzi, who raised his brothers child thinking it was his. Vukani himself, who hates both of us to find out that Langalethu is indeed his real father, and the father he thought was his is actually his uncle.
After a minute of trying to compose myself, I wipe my tears and look up at him.
“Does Vukani know?” he shook his head.
“We aren’t going to tell him anything.” I don’t think that is a good idea.
“So he’s going to succeed the throne?” I ask feeling a sense of relief.
“No, he isn’t. The throne belongs to your son.” oh no.
“By culture, Vukani is Zwelibanzi’s son because he was born into wedlock, but it’s a little complicated than that now because the ancestors want me to claim him as my son, and apologize to Zwelibanzi.”
It really should be the other way around. In fact, non of the brothers should be apologizing to each other, MaMzobe should be doing all of those things.
“So what do you need me to advise you on?” he reached for my hands.
I just looked at him. I feel very betrayed right now, I won’t give him my hands, he doesn’t deserve them.
“I just need my wife by my side, to help me through this, to hold my hand.” he took one hand of mine. I let him.
“Please mkami.” this is more complicated that it seems.
I really feel betrayed, and I know I shouldn’t blame him, but I can’t help it. It’s how I feel and I don’t think I will be okay with him, not now.
“I will if you tell Vukani.” I say.
He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath in.
He doesn’t look like he’s willing to take my offer. I have no choice but to support him through anything and everything he faces, I just don’t think I will be able to do it now. I need some space from him.
“I will dish up for you and bring it to you, I’ll be sleeping in my old room tonight.” I say while standing up.
He doesn’t protest. He looks defeated.
“MaGumede?” I close my eyes shut and let the tears fall.
I don’t want him to see me so I don’t turn around before I wipe them. When I finally do, he as his elbows on his knees and he’s looking at me.
“I’m sorry once again.” he says.
His sorry is not going to change reality now.
My job now is just to make sure that Vukani gets introduced as Langalethu’s son so everyone is happy, and Mhlabawesizwe can finally rest in peace.
It’s my job to do that as Langalethu’s wife, and most importantly, the Queen of Zululand like Mhlabawesizwe said I was.
Waze wasinda umthwalo.