Dead Fighter

10. Not Today...

*I don't know if there will be a flashback but if there is then I may put it at the bottom this time*

Jesus fuck I don't know if I will be able to handle this. I had an scratchy throat yesterday but right the fuck now my throat is killing me. I'm very sleepy and I need sleep but it's hurting bad and hurting my ears and making my head hurt badly too.

My throat is killing me still and I been up for almost 3 hours. I guess I'm going to try to go back to sleep.

Well I had some biscuits and gravy, it belong to my father and I got a peppi for myself from Tudors. Casi is being needy but he knows mommy is sick. I also tried brushing my teeth and ended up throwing up which fucking sucks as hell.

My father must fucking bother me again. I'm very sick and he wants me to walk my brother's dogs. Someone please choke me (not in a good way either).

I'm kinda hungry but I'm more thirsty. Casi is sleeping right beside his mommy again. He's so fucking cute and I love him to death. Mama wants me to come stay a week with her but I ain't too sure exactly when or if I want to.

I got to go clean my puppy's carrier out and spray it hoping the poop smell disappears. I love my puppy but sometimes I wish he didn't leave stinky poop, why couldn't it smell like roses or some shit? I'm kidding, kinda. I don't mind it just don't feel so good right now.

I'm not a big fan of religion shit. I'm a Spiritually Awaken person. I know Heaven and God is real but I don't believe the Bible or what is said because I wasn't born then. I do pray though and I prayed for others. I believe in other gods (and goddesses) too, like Hercules, Athena, Medusa (that's my girl), Zeus, etc. I really need prayers for myself right now. I'm stuck in the bathroom. I have threw up multiple times, mucus, stomach pain, stopped up nose, sore throat, itchy and hurting ears, headache, arthritis (which I had that beforehand), sneezing a lot, and etc.

If y'all pray please pray for me. I don't care who you pray to, pray for me please. It might be to Satan for all I know, you don't have to tell me who really you don't but just pray for me. No I can't make you pray for me but don't think I'm forcing religion on you because I am not! I don't even like it when it's forced on me.

I hope y'all will learn to like or love my book. I am trying to work on another but I have been busy. Thank y'all and I love y'all <3 :)

*If you don't want to hear about sex or intoxicating behavior then skip out this chapter and the next one please don't read to get triggered, I'll feel bad*

Flashback (part 1)

*Rens (me) is drinking hardcore with Kailer and their friends

Me: *chugs alcohol with K and their friends East, Ry, and Clay*
Clay: Man Kai, she drinks....scarier like more than them
K: Yeah I know but she needs it. She really really needs it. Let's just take care of her, she needs it. *Watches me drunk and dancing with East with a smile*
Me: *mumbles* Hiiii
East: Hey kiddo, how you feeling?
Me: *giggles and hugs him* I feel greattttt! How about you?!
East: *hugs me tightly back* I feel just fine kiddo, I'm so happy you're feeling great dear.
K: *pulls me to him* Hey princess, it's just me
Me: Look it's my lover! *Wraps arms around his neck dancing with him* You my love drops
K: *smiles* I'll be whatever you want. *Wraps his arms around my waist and dancing slowly with me* Everything ok? Did he hurt you?
Me: He can't hurt me if I'm with you. He cheated on me...well again for probably the millionth time. I'm glad I'm with you and them right now instead of him.
K: I'll always protect you princess and maybe you should break up with him.
Me: I wanna cheat on him back, I just don't think it would hurt him maybe piss him off....I don't care anymore *kisses Kailer*
East: *smiles and nudges the other boys* Ain't they perfect?
Ry: They truly are and they deserve each other really. K never shuts up about her, I don't mind but he must really love her.
K: *Kisses back more holding my face*
Me: *pulls away* I shouldn't do this *stares at him with glossy eyes* Fuck it and fuck him, he never thinks about me *pulls K back to me and kisses him more*
East: Come on boys, maybe we should go *pushes them out the door and shuts it back*
Me: *pulls him down on the couch with me and keeps kissing deeply*
K: *stops and looks down at me* God I love you, I extremely love you. I can't live with you, my life got better with you.
Me: Kailer please *kisses him again and moves to his neck*
K: *Grunts and pulls away* Mia, we can't.
Me: *looks* You don't want me?...
K: No, I do! I want this but you're drunk.
Me: It never stopped you before with other girls...or other people. I'm giving consent to you, please
K: Mia, you aren't other girls or people. I can't do this to you, they was just for sex. You are more than just sex, I want it different with you. I want you to remember it. When you are sober, we can. I will be gladly to do what you want but you can't be drunk princess. Go to sleep and we can talk later.
Me: Oh....okay
K: *gets up and starts putting his jacket on*
Me: *looks* C-Can you....nevermind, good night
K: No, can I what? *Stops and comes over to me* what you need princess? Can I what for you?
Me: Can you stay with me?....at least until I fall asleep...
K: *Takes jacket off* Yes of course
Me: Thank you
K: *lays beside me and pulls me against his chest playing with my hair* I'm right here princess, I'm right here
Me: *falls asleep*
K: *eases up and turns light off then covers me up* good night princess *kisses my head and walks to the door to put his shoes on*
Me: *whines and starts moving*
K: *looks then takes his shoes back off and locks the door climbing back in the bed with me* God you really are pussy whipping me. *Kisses my head and holds me close* I ain't leaving you princess, never ever. I love you so much *lays head against mine* good night

*Kailer did stay that night and I slept amazing with him. He was gone the next morning when I woke up but he came back. Next part involves sexual scenes and I don't recommend cheating no matter what but I believe you do it and I have all rights to do it too. Don't judge me, I know two wrongs don't make a right but oh well*

End of Flashback