Forest Darling

Chapter 39 - Sweetie

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Chapter 39

°Harriet

I put Ella's paintings in an envelope and tap my finger in water to seal the paper.

"Come here, Ella. You can write your name now." I say and point my finger at the top half of the envelope. I already put 'from' and 'to' with stamps on it beforehand.

I give her a pink sharpie and close my hand around hers.

Below her name we write Theo's. After that we do the same procedure on the one for Fynn.

Of course, like the good sister I am. I will send these presents per express to Santa so he can put them under our Christmas tree. I told Ella that Santa can't make special presents like a beautiful painting or the stuffie we found in the store, so we have to buy it and send it to him so he can give it to Theo and Fynn.

Ella and I have chosen a cute tiger for Theo's collection and she will give it to him in addition to the painted picture. I got him a voucher for the toy store of our city. Fynn will get a special gift, that is unique und totally embarrassing for me.

I don't want to offend Noah but over the last few months Fynn has become my best friend, don't get me wrong I didn't kick Noah from his position but they have to share it now.

Of course, I also didn't tell him that and hope to get his mind off of my weird behavior by sending him a polaroid camera with the plead to make silly photographs of him and cool places he visited.

My anxiety attacks have worsened and are now coming almost every day. Day or night, it doesn't matter the time or place. I can't find a specific trigger and I'm physically and mentally exhausted.

I haven't been to school last week because I'm not able to leave the house out of fear having a panic attack somewhere that isn't my home. My mom and Fynn are managing to calm them pretty fast but everyone else including me, aren't able to calm the terror that washes over my body sometime during the day.

The duration is between half an hour to hour, until my body can't keep the imagined dread up and shuts down completely.

Getting stuck in the house for a week is weird and gives me a lonely feeling. My dad voluntarily to work from home so I don't need to call someone as soon as the attack begins to start.

I walk into my room and take off my sleeping shorts to change into a pair of black sweatpants. I bought partner look shirts for me and Ella. Mine has the face and upper body of Rudolf, hers the rest of his body.

We all agreed that it is much better to wear cozy clothes instead of tight dresses and stiff jeans with plain dress shirts.

The door bell rings and I run downstairs. My mom reaches it first and swings open the door with a huge smile.

"Merry Christmas, nice that you both made it." She says and holds her hand out.

Fynn returns the gesture.

"Thanks for inviting us Mrs. Levine."

"You can call me Marisa." She says and leans down to Theo who is hiding behind Fynn's leg.

"Merry Christmas to you too."

"Theo is a bit shy. He will get more talkative after a while." Fynn explains.

"That's totally fine. Make yourself a home." She lets them in and takes their jackets.

"Harriet our guests arrived."

I come out of my hiding spot behind the wall.

"Arry!" Theo shouts and runs towards me.

He jumps into my arms and I hug him firmly.