I Fell Inlove With My Bestfriend

IFIWMB 40: Not this way

Ember’s POV

"We decided to let you, and John Angelo Saragoza, get engaged." Tumayo ako. I know they we’re shocked sa inasal ko, and me, too! I was shocked by their interesting plan, huh?! Do they find this, interesting?! Do they?!

I looked at them, one by one. I suddenly felt a tear escaped from my eye. Since wala nama’ng gusto’ng magsalita, I started the argue. Yes! Argue!

"Tell me, this is a joke dad. Hindi biro ang engagement thing na ‘yan." I looked at him. Anger. ‘Yan ang nararamdaman ko ngayon.

"Do you think we’re joking? Oh c’mon Ember, this is the right time!" I know he’s convincing me to do what they want, but I don’t love JA!

"Right time?! Huh? Dad? Right time for what?! First of all, I’m not ready to get engaged, second, I am not ready to marry and to be a wife of--of a man I don’t really love. And lastly," I faced JA, also looking at me. "I’m sorry but I don’t love the man you wanted me to get engaged with." I know nasaktan ako dun. He’s a great friend, but what can I do? I don’t love him! Ayokong umasa si JA sa wala! Because, damn! I don’t want him to get hurt in the end!

"We’re not forcing you but you need this—we need this, Ember. For the company. Magagawa mo rin siyang mahalin." I slowly looked at dad na kanina nakatitig lang ako kay JA. I looked at him. Nakipagsukat ako ng tinginan. Hindi ako uurong, not now, not ever.

"NO! Not this way, dad. Not this way." Naramdaman kong hinawakan ni mom ang kamay ko. Tinignan ko siya, the look of saying ‘please help me mom’ but she just shooked her head.

"Sweetie, you’ll love him." Sabi ulit ni dad. I closed my eyes, trying to hold my temper but shit! I can’t!

"Damn that love! That business! Kaya kong i-manage at palakihin ang business natin by MYSELF! I don’t need a husband. I don’t need love—at all." Nabigla sila, I don’t care! I don’t fucking care, because all I know, from the very start of my whole story, I don’t deserve that shitty heartache from love. LOVE—that’s a fucking word that MUST be ignored.

Hindi pa rin sila nagsasalita. Hell! I can’t stand this!

"And this?" I gestured my hand showing them the whole room. "This? This is bullshit!" Pagkatapos kong sabihin yun, lumabas ako ng bahay. I know nagalit si mom and dad sa inakto ko, but do they care about me? How I felt? ‘Yan kasi ang problema sa tatay ko! Masyadong ma-business! Bukam bibig yung business na yan! Nabibwisit na ako sa trabaho na yan! Bakit pa kailangan i-engage?! Kapag namatay sila, I can handle it myself! I don’t need to depend on others. Shit! Pumunta ako sa garage. Nandito na ang bago kong kotse. Mustang. I tried to open the door—and great, ‘cause it’s open and the keys are inserted. I want to be alone. Damn, alone! Far away from this crap. Interesting? Hah! Interesting mukha nila. I know I’m acting a bit uneducated, but can’t they feel the way I do? Ayokong maikasal! I’m just 20 and they’re forcing me to get engage! They’re saying they’re not, but they are! Approximately, with my close friend. It’s not that I really don’t like JA, but I don’t want this! Bumabalik ang past ko! I can’t handle this. I’m trying to escape the pain, the longing, and I just… I just fucking can’t! Why does my past always haunting me?! Tangna oh! Nagbago na ang tao, binabalik pa nila ako sa dati.

Ang tangang Ember Ly.

Napasabunot ako sa buhok ko ng wala sa oras. Umiiyak ako at marahas ko rin naman yun pinapahiran kapag tumutulo ito. I can’t love JA back, and I just hate hurting others when I know, deep inside me, I don’t love them! And I will never—ever, love anyone else. Except…him. Ugh! No, Ember. You’d moved on. Never let your heart rule over you. Never!

John Angelo’s POV

Ember went away while angry and teary-eyed. I saw my parents sighed. Actually, nagulat rin ako at first noong nalaman kong i-eengage kami ni Ember. I admit, I do still have a little feeling in my heart that I want her. To be my fiancé, and not just a fiancé—I know I want more than that. But the way she acted kanina? I can’t believe how love--disppeared from her life. I can see and feel it, through her eyes. She’s been blinded by anger. Ano ba ang nangyari noong bumalik ako dito sa US? I thought---I thought she was happy and contented when I left her. I didn’t even know why France–didn’t attend her debut.