Billie's POV Walking up early morning to throw up has become part my routine and I'm not sure why. I mean I'll literally wake up like today at 3am throw up back to sleep. Wake up at 5:30 throw up back to sleep. Wake up at 7 throw up back to sleep and that repeats until I'm done sleeping. It also happens when I eat certain foods and when I eat breakfast in the morning.
I haven't told anyone apart from Reese but that's because she heard me throw up multiple times this morning. She is also taking me to the doctors in a couple of hours because she said something could be wrong. At this point if it is I hope it kills me. I finally broke up with James but now I'm in a low.
I was never happy completely in that relationship I only enjoyed the attention. You could say I'm a slut for attention because I am. Anyway I made Reese promise not to tell my mom, dad or Finneas Mainly because I don't want them to worry about me.
Walking into the car and putting my belt on I couldn't help but feel sick. Whether that was because she made me eat breakfast or my nerves. A couple of seconds later Reese came out and handed me a container just in case I needed to be sick.
She said she thinks she knows what it is but won't tell me just in case it's not. Throughout the drive I would be comforted and she would try and take my mind off the appointment Eventhough it didn't work I appreciated the effort.
*After the doctors appointment (I'm lazy)*
So bro I'm the doctors I kid you not they made me pee in the closet and then acted like I did wrong. Like I was disgusting. So I decided to tell my babies about it.
(Change any part of this that mentions Maggie to Reese)
In an hour we will get a message saying what's wrong with me. Everyone was like yeah definitely that's what's wrong but we have to be sure. Like dude if your not going to tell me don't talk loud where I can hear you.
Anyway we are driving home to get ready and then go out for a meeting about tour. When we got home I put on my already planned outfit on and head to out to the meeting since I'm already late.
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Me and Reese walked into the room and already theirs eyes on me but that could because I'm nearly an hour late. I sat down in a seat and add my input every now and then but I'm gonna be honest I'm not really listening.
Half way through I got the text of what's wrong with me and I'm refusing to believe it. You could say I'm in denial.
They are gonna sort out the dates and all that and then at the end of the week I'll post them and then give them a month before actually going on the tour.
As I was leaving Reese asked me out. Not to be girlfriends but like a cafe date. I said no tho. Girl I just got told I'm pregnant I feel like if I eat I'll be sick just thinking about it. Oop I didn't mean to tell you that.
Well your the only person I'm gonna tell for a while I need to come to terms with it. I know it's James kid because well I've only been with him for the last 2 years so.
As soon as I get home I crawl into bed turning the light on red and just zone out staring at my wall.
How am I even pregnant? Like yeah I know how I maybe homeschooled but my mom did teach me that shit. But like how? Everytime I made him use protection so I don't understand. Am I going to tell him? Like he'll probably see the videos and photos when it's older but I'm gonna be honest I don't want to see him.
I always thought that me and Reese were going to have a kid together but this is not what I wanted. Aparently I'm 6 weeks through and up to 12 there is a high chance of miscarriage. Like I don't want a kid now but I ain't killing it. What's the saying 'everything is for a reason' or something like that.
Incoming call from Reese <3
I pressed answer and put it up to my ear.
"Bil?"
"Yeah what's up"
"Can I come over"
"Umm sure "
"Ok see you soon I love you"
With that the phone hang up. That's mad weird. Like that whole conversation. One she asked to come over. That hasn't happened for like nearly 3 years and 2 she said I love you first. I'm worried.
I ran downstairs and unlocked the door allowing her in. As soon as the door shut she hugged me tightly. I was scared that she might be able to tell if I was pregnant. I don't know whether it feels different maybe it's harder idk.
I reciprocated the hug and slowly walked to my bedroom with her clinging to me. We finally got to my bed and she layer on top of me as I ran my fingers through her hair calming her down.
After a while she fell asleep and I couldn't help but feel in awe. I'm going to be honest it wasn't long before I fell asleep as well. It was probably something to do with the weight on my chest being comforting.
Waking up to throw up early morning again I'm just so tired of it. I managed to get out of Reese's grip making sure not to wake her up and went to the bathroom. Did what I had to do brush my teeth, washing around my mouth and crawling back into bed cuddling Reese again.
The next time I woke up was 9am which I'm very happy about. After finishing up in the bathroom I got dressed and woke up the sleeping Reese.
"Hey sleepy head" I said pecking her forehead and stroking her cheek
As she woke up she looked panicked and then calmed down once she realised she was in my arms. She ended up telling that she had a nightmare about her dad and he said that he was going to kill me so she has to suffer. After hearing this I offered her to stay over mine for a while to help her sleep peacefully knowing I'm safe which she reluctantly accepted.
I'm thinking about telling her about me being pregnant but the only problem is I don't want her telling anyone not that I have to worry about that but the only thing I am worried about is her telling my parents or worse finn.
-1157 words
I wrote this half asleep and can't be bothered to change the narrative and keep this for another time sooooooo
