Sirius Expelled

Sirius Expelled: Part 32

There is Jily now. First of all, don't ask me why or how, I don't know either. Second of all, no, Lily is NOT a replacement for Regulus and James did NOT move on too fast. Did that happen? I don't know... It's been seven months since Winter Break and James really only found Regulus for maybe 4 months so I don't want to see anybody saying anything about that. Secondly, I know Marlily is a popular ship but between what happened in the last chapter and uh, cannon-ish stuff (this isn't cannon complient but the war kinda is), Lily didn't date her, ever, they were only friends. However, I do hc Lily as a lesbian SO the Jily stuff... It's a bit awkward and not very romantic. I cannot see Lily with James, ever, but there's a reason I need Jily. The answer is Harry... Just, bear with it. It's very sidelined because honestly, I can't write it very well. I'm a Jegulus/Marpanlily writer. Finally, I don't want to see any people being upset that Lily doesn't understand being bi/pan or anything under that umbrella. Normally, I wouldn't characterize her like that but this felt more realistic. She is understandably confused and a bit hurt. Seeing a gay couple (dorlene and Wolfstar) makes sense to her but she doesn't know any bi or pan people (yet) so she doesn't understand James being pan and liking both Regulus and her.

If you want to see Marlily or anything, wait for my next fic! It's a Marlily to Marpanlily fic, Lily's POV, happy ending, filled with fluff, with lesbian Lily. But for now, this fic is Jily (I don't like it very much but it's necessary to the plot)

TW: mentions of self-harm, mentions of suicide, mentions of former death and a semi forced show of self harm scars. Also some queer/bi/pan phobic comments but NOT in a cruel way, in a "'I'm confused and hurt" way (yes it's Lily to James)

Honestly, the warning are pretty clean but it's really awkward, uncomfortable and painful, a lot more then you would expect from so few warnings. Be careful with reading and enjoy!

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The Order of the Phoenix had a meeting the next day. Remus was sent a Patronus telling him to bring Sirius so he did.

Order meetings took place at Potter manor, which was now owned by James. As they walked up to the door, Sirius felt sick to his stomach.

"Last time I was here, Voldemort killed Effie and Monty." Sirius whispered to Remus, holding his arm tightly.

The two weren't quite ready to hold hands, not yet, so Sirius gripped his arm in fear but Remus let him.

"It's going to be okay. No matter what happens, I'm going to defend you, okay?" Remus said, looking into Sirius's eyes with complete honesty.

Sirius nodded.

"You have done some bad things. Everybody knows that. But you have been tortured and abused and everything you have done is to survive. You know that." Remus said.

Taking a breath, Sirius straightened up and his face cleared of emotion, blocking out his feelings to give him confidence. Remus didn't like it when he did that but it was one of the only ways to get Sirius out of his panic attacks so he let it go as they walked in.

"Good. You're here." Moody said, looking them up and down. "What is the first thing I learned about you?"

"I'm a werewolf and going on a mission for Dumbledore." Remus responded without missing a beat.

"How many times did I attempt Legillamicy on you?" Moody asked Sirius.

"Th-three." Sirius said, hesitantly.

"That's right. We never know if there are imposters so we always ask questions." Moody explained. "Lupin, go ahead inside. Black, stay here. You can come in after. I'm going to talk to everybody else first."