The Moment I Knew | On-Going

CHAPTER 32

"Floresca, may dalaw ka," rinig kong wika ng isang pulis sa loob.

I readied myself to see him, to finally able to talk to him. In fact, I was a bit scared. I runaway again. But this time, I runaway from him. Alam kong naiintindihan niya ang maaaring sitwasyon ko, pero I couldn't help to feel anxious about how would he feel and react.

Lihim akong napatawa sa sarili ko. Of course, he will feel hurt. Sino bang matutuwa kung malalaman mong iniwan ka ng taong mahal mo? If I were in his place, I'll feel betrayed. With all the promises I uttered to him na I'll be with him, bigla bigla ko nalang sisirain.

Then he appeared with his hand cuff. I saw how haggard he become. I felt a pang in my heart. I did this. I did this to him.

Naramdaman ko ang paghawak ng taong katabi ko sa aking kanang kamay. Pinisil niya ito na tila ba sinasabi sa aking magiging okay lang din ang lahat.

I hope that things will get better. I really do.

"Diana," wika niya at binigyan ako ng ngiti. Agad akong napaluha nang maupo siya sa aming harapan.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," paulit ulit kong wika. Nath didn't let go of my hand, as if it's the only source of strength I could have.

"It's okay. It's not your fault." Rinig kong sabi ni Seb. Tumingin ako sa kanya and he smiled at me reassuringly. How...How could he be like that? After all these things, bakit hindi niya nalang ako sisihin?

I feel guilty for everything. And I know I must take responsibility for it.

"I'll get you out of this, Seb. I'm really sorry."

"Diana," tawag niya at iniabot ang kaliwa kong kamay na nasa mesa. Hinawakan niya ito ng kanyang dalawang kamay na nakaposas. I stared at it, at parang tinutusok ang puso ko sa aking nakikita.

"Hindi mo kailangang akuin ang lahat ng responsibilidad. Pare-pareho lang tayong biktima rito. Isa pa, ginusto ko ring makasama ka. Naging selfish ako at hinangad kita. It's just that, our decisions were wrong in the eyes of another. So please, don't hurt yourself anymore than you do now."

"Sebastian's right, Diana. We'll get through this. Walang ginagawang masama si Sebastian, at patutunayan natin iyon."

Natapos ang oras na nakalaan sa pagbisita. I hugged Seb tightly. "I'll be okay, don't worry," bulong niya sa akin. Pinanuod ko siyang bumalik sa loob ng selda bago ako iginiya ni Nathaniel palabas ng presinto.

I thought I already prepared myself for the worst, but I was wrong. May ikalalala pa pala ang sitwasyon. Right outside the precint was my Mom waiting.

Well, not that I didn't see this coming. Alam kong sooner or later, mahahanap din nila ako. And it'll be the time for me to go home.

"You know it's better for you to come with me," wika ni Mommy na animo'y nagbabanta sa kanyang tono.

Nathaniel squeezed my hand and glanced at me. Tipid ko siyang nginitian. Sapat na ang lahat ng mga ginawa niya para sa akin. He doesn't need to defend me right now.

Tumango ako kay Mommy at sumakay na sa kotse. Bago pa maisara ang pinto ay narinig kong kinausap niya si Nathaniel. "I can't believe you, Nathaniel. Of all people? I cannot further tolerate your action in the future. This would be the last."

Napaiwas na lamang ako ng tingin sa kanila. Gusto kong matawa at sabunutan ang sarili ko. All throughout the ride, wala akong ibang inisip kundi kung papaano ko aayusin 'to. If I wished for them to pardon Seb, would they do so? I know they wouldn't do it without compromising a thing.

So, will I let them proceed sa korte? Masyado nang lalaki pa ang gulo if I let it happen. Most of all, this would affect Sebastian's future. I don't want to ruin his life just because of me.