𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒, benny rodriguez.

xix.

i sat on my bed, ignoring all the vibrations coming from my phone. i hadn't heard from benny in 5 days.

the last time i've been out of my room was when issac took me to the book store a few days ago. the day i told phillips i couldn't be friends with him anymore.

i missed him. i missed how i could talk to him about anything and how he would protect me. i know it sounds horrible since him and benny literally hate each other but phillips has became one of my best friends since i moved here.

i missed benny a lot. he was the only thing on my mind. i wished he would be laying down next to me on my bed watching a movie. i missed playing with him and the boys at the sandlot. i missed everything about him.

i knew i messed up, but i've been trying to fix it. i just need to apologize, but i had no clue on how i'm going to do that. the only thing that was stopping me from going to his house and apologizing was the fear that he just doesn't want anything to do with me anymore.

i would also feel the same way if he was bestfriends with carmen. i feel so horrible about everything.

i decided to get up and go see issac. i knew i could talk to him about it.

i quickly threw benny's hoodie that he gave me on and walked downstairs. i hated how quiet it was all of the time.

i made it to issac's room and knocked on his door. he yelled for me to come in so i opened the door and entered his room.

he was sitting on the edge of his bed, playing on his ps5. i sat down next to him and watched him play for a couple of seconds.

"what's up?" he asked, his eyes still focusing on his game.

"i need advice, and your the only one i could ask because your a boy and you can probably help"

"what is it?" he said, still focused on his game.

"it's about benny. i told you i messed up but the more that i think about it the worse it gets, and i don't know what to do" i sighed. he nodded for me to continue.

"basically, you know about phillips and him already. but after the party i was super drunk and he kissed me and i guess benny saw"

i paused for a couple of seconds then continued.

"and i also might've hung out with him and benny saw and got really mad and basically said things were over between us but i don't know how to apologize and i miss him so much" i said.

"okay, i get why he's mad. but you should just go and apologize to him. the worse he could do is probably kick you out or something" he said.

"like right now?" i asked.

"yes, now go. also if you get the chance can you get me some gummy worms" he smiled. i rolled my eyes and walked into the living room.

i couldn't decide if issac was right or not. i could either go and apologize and maybe ruin me and benny's relationship forever or go back to my room.

i sighed and walked towards the door. hopefully issac was right.

i opened the door to be met with benny. we stared at each other for a few seconds.

"oh, uh i was looking for you" he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"oh" i said quietly. i wanted to tell him everything and how much i missed him but i stood quiet. i wasn't really prepared to see him that quickly.

"just so you know i wanted to say sorry. smalls told me about phillips. i'm sorry for just lashing out on you like that, but i really miss you. i didn't realize how much you mean to me, and i've been such a dick since we started dating. i'm sorry" he said. a small smile formed on my lips, then i started giggling.

"what?" he asked, confused.

"nothing. i missed you way more, and i'm also sorry. i was stupid. and your not a dick" i giggled, wrapping my arms around his neck and pressing his lips onto mine.

i pulled away after a few seconds and we walked inside and went to my room. as we entered, he jumped on my bed and turned on the tv.

"nice hoodie" he said, the corners of his lips turning up slightly. i smiled and sat down next to him.

"did you hear about what i did to that one girl, i forgot her name" i said.

"oh yeah, julie told me. that girl has been obsessed with me since like the third grade. she honestly makes me so uncomfortable" he said. i nodded and cuddled into him.

he turned his head and kissed my cheek. i smiled and started watching the tv.

i never wanted my time with benny to end. he made me feel so safe and loved. he's all i've ever wanted.

i might be back!! there's been so much going on in my life it's crazy tbh. my only goal is to finish this book and maybe make another one 😉