What we could've been | TWD Carnid

JUST SURVIVE SOMEHOW

ENID

It's been more than a month since the barn. Weeks that I have been all alone, hiding in the woods from the whisperers. I mostly cover myself with mud to which I add some moss and grass to blend in thebackground. But my body shivering and the falling leaves indicates tome that my camouflage clothing won't last long. Neither will I without something to cover myself with. I came across a destroyed camp a few weeks back, by the whisperers I assumed, which allowed me to dress better but I am still shivering because of the cold. I can't even make a fire without showing my position to the whisperers. I can't leave the forest either, not with the whisperers surrounding it.

Every walker is a potential human which makes it even harder, they might be just walker but I won't take that bet. Especially alone, I can't take on walkers but if there are several whisperers among them... I haven't gone so far to die like that. I have to keep going. For them. So I mostly hide. I have become quite good at this since, avoiding them by climbing up the trees or just running away. But I can't do that forever.

That is until I hear a branch cracking a few meters from where I am, I get up right away, knife in hand, looking around and keeping my ears open for growls or whispers. I am so focused on the small herd in front of me that I don't notice the walker behind me until it's trying to bite my shoulder. I let a small shriek before pushing him away and stabbing it by the side of his skull. I catch the walker and slowly put him down so as not to make any sound. The walkers are getting closer, so I decide to climb up that tree and see for myself if there are whisperers among them. Good thing I did because as soon as the group reached the dead body I heard some whispers being repeated over and over again.

"Find her. She can't be far."

I stay there, my head against the trunk, even after they are gone. Iwant to say it's by precaution but it's mostly because of fear.Every limb of my body is shaking as memories of that night keepcoming up in mind. I feel shivers coming down my spine but then aheatwave makes me sweat. I try to push away my memories, locking upmy feelings but it doesn't work as a wave of nausea takes me when Iremember their lifeless blank eyes. My breath keeps getting heavier, my heart is racing up. I put my hand on my mouth not to make a sound but it doesn't work so I bite into my arm. I bite as hard as I can, as a way to extarnalize all of my suffering, all of my fear. It doesn't work obviously, but it gives me something else to think about rather than the group of whisperers a few meters away from my hide-out. I usually try not to think about it, focusing on surviving instead, something quite hard when you are all alone with nothing to do. But the whispers echoing just brought it all back, again.

They are always chasing me no matter if it's in reality or in my dreams. I can't escape them. One day or another they will catch up to me and who knows what they will do then. Sometimes, just sometimes I want to stop running. That's when I find myself writing on the branches ofthe three letters I had been writing for so long when I was alone : JSS for just survive somehow. That's what I keep repeating to myself over and over while I am freezing alone in the woods or when they are getting closer. The three letters I thought I will never had to write again.... How shitty is destiny.

I wait for a long time, trying to rest a bit up on the tree, before coming down. I pick up the ax I hastily buried in the dirt before climbing in the tree, tie it on a bag I found, and leave. Whisperers and the cold aren't my only concerns, I need water and food. Berries have kept me going for a while, thank god Maggie taught me which ones are safe to eat, but it's not enough. As for water, I had to leave the stream I was walking along until a few days ago because of the whisperers guarding it, and the flask I found in a destroyed camp is nearly empty. I need to get back to the stream one way or another.