Papillon - HS

Chapter 26

We were finally leaving Miami. I had been so excited for our little break and it had started perfectly, but it all got ruined so quickly. I felt so stupid for believing he could like me. Of course he doesn't, he is looking for fun and good looking girls with great bodies. He just wants someone to mess around with, nothing real or truly meaningful. Because at the end, that is all men want. They all want the same thing: sex. 

I just can't believe I thought he wanted something more. He had been acting all along, pretending to like me and being all cute just to get me to bed. But you know what? I am glad nothing happened with at the end. He does not deserve to be with me in any way. I am closing all the doors on him. No more flirting. No more kissing his cheek. No more being friends or partners in crime.

I felt tears streaming down my cheeks and I hated it. I hated that I had to be crying over a jackass who never wanted anything truly serious. That is why I never let myself be vulnerable with anyone, because at the end of the day, all people do is disappoint. Especially men. And Harry showed me he was not the exception but the norm.

I got into the bus earlier than anyone, I did not want to run into Harry or that girl. I was not in the mood of pretending to be fine. I wanted to cry, scream, slap someone. But I couldn't, I had to do my job. A job I had dreamed of, a job I loved. This man was not ruining this opportunity for me. If he wanted to whore around with someone else, then be my guest, just don't expect me to go back to how we were.

I climbed into my bunk bed and decided it would be a good idea to put on some headphones. I wanted to avoid over hearing any weird sounds or inappropriate conversation. I turned to face the wall and closed my eyes. I shuddered thinking how the last time I had fallen asleep on the bus, Harry was holding me tight. 

I let out an exasperated sigh and turned to look upwards, my hands covering my face. I felt the tears wanting to come out but then I felt the curtain opening. I turned to look who it was and it was, obviously, Harry.

"What do you want?" I asked, rolling my eyes.

He lifted something dark and placed it on the side of the bed, "you left this in my room the other night."

I grabbed it and realized it was my dress.

"Thank you, is that it?" 

He simply nodded. I closed the curtain without saying anything else and placed the dress in a corner. 

All of a sudden, it started to smell like him too much. I brought the dress closer to my nose and it realized it smelled like him. But there was no way a dress could contain such a strong smell. I had no doubt in my mind this man sprayed my dress with his cologne before giving it to me. And it sounds like he would do that, so petty. He knows I used to like how he smelled. He knew he had to give it back to me at some point. 

Fuck him. 

I closed my eyes and tried my hardest just to sleep. I still had to write in my journal but there was something in me wanted to erase these past three days. I did had some good things I could rescue. Like getting my first tattoo. I really liked the little wishbone I got, I think it goes along with me perfectly. I felt a bit calmer and it was easier to sleep.

When I woke up, I decided to stay in the seats at the front of the bus. There was no way I would go back there and risk seeing Harry with his tongue down on her throat. I wanted to throw up at the mere thought. I grabbed my bag and went to find a seat. I was surprised to see all of the guys there, except for Harry, of course.

"Look who finally woke up," Niall said, "welcome back bumblebee."

I smiled and sat down beside him.

"What are you all doing here?"