𝐃𝐞𝐣𝐚 𝐕𝐮

𝐗𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐫 | 𝟓

Another sleepless night, Another bullshit day. Last night was a faze, I was so drunk while the boys and I were playing some card games.

Ajax sat next to me and like always he said the most shit to piss me off. What hit me was when he mentioned Octavia. "I truely feel sorry for her, due to your lack of precence, she forgets she's even married to you." Ajax says putting a card on the table. "I don't want you near her." I state. "She already likes me more than you primo, I mean whats there to not like." I swing my arm hitting his face.

Jax has always got along with people better than me but he's still twisted in his own way, not everyone knows because he has ways to hide it. That boy will get her attached to us, Octavia's confidence is already sky high I dont need her becoming a problem to me.

I lie in bed for the whole morning. I light a ciggerette and take a few puffs. Shutting my eyes, I reimagine yesterdays visit in Octavia's room. She looked so weak and needy, even if she tried keeping a strong face on. I smile as I put the ciggerette between my lips. Her body fits perfectly in my hold. Her glossy eyes looking at me with slight fear. Her thick hair smelling like coconut. Looking like Blair. I open my eyes and grab something from inside my nightstand.

A necklace made of pearls, I was meant to give this to Blair the day she met my father. I had it all planned out to ask her to marry me that day. Only if I waited a bit longer, she would be here with me instead of that Jordanian princess.

Octavia was beyond beautiful, Brown hair and eyes, little freckles and long lashes but she wasn't Blair. Blair was like an angel, the light in my darkness.

I squash the cigarette on the ashtray and head downstairs. I walk into the living room to expect Octavia but it was only Ajax watching tv. "It's three in the afternoon primo why come now?" I ignore him and sit down.

He looks me in the eye then pours us both a cup of whatever toxin was in that bottle. I take a sip and look through the door. It was awfully silent today, normally I'd find Octavia and Ajax laughing their heads off, or Octavia talking to Rosa. Rosalyn was like a sister to me. She grew up with us but since her incident she did everything to avoid the prick who's currently hogging up my living room.

I would do anything to protect Rosalyn, she was like one of us hence why I couldn't leave her alone it that mansion.
I didn't give a shit if she hurt Ajax. Honestly he went to far with her but thats his issue.

"Eli told me she hasn't left her room all day if you're wondering." Ajax said. I sit back on the couch and bluntly reply, "I didn't ask."

He sits up and rests his elbows on his knees. "Why did you marry her if you're not going to try loving her?"

"I didn't choose to, father did this to gain the Jordanians trust so the mafia grows." I admit, surely he knew that. "That doesn't explain why you're a dickhead to her."

How do I tell him I cannot express love. "You of all people should know, love isn't for everyone." He breaths a laugh at my comment, Ajax loves people but would never commit into something unless it's his father's orders. So all he does is shag girls then dispose them. If their lucky he would fuck them twice otherwise females ain't nothing but fun and games to him.

"You have to move on. Your head is still in the past and that's going to fuck up your marriage." I grip my glass tightly then I release it slowly. "She will never be like Blair." I say quietly. They both had curly hair and rosey soft lips. Everytime Octavia spoke her dimple showed which pisses me off. There wasn't much to hate about her but she was annoying as fuck.

"You're a asshole to Octavia because she reminds you of Blair?" For a person as smart as Ajax, he happens to be slow in many things.

I never had anything against Octavia, I just can't lose someone to love again. "The love Octavia is looking for will be the same love that'll kill her, so I will destroy it first."