I just got out of the shower, I'm leaving soon with Alice. For a gig this evening. I'm worried about her, she told me yesterday that she's been bullied alot. I try to get her to talk about it but she doesn't wanna, but I'm not gonna force her either. She can always come to me, she knows this. After I dried myself using two towels I put my clothes on. I let my hair fall the way it wants to.
Alice is so sad the past few month, she barely talks and always starres to nowhere. It's not the Alice i know, I walk to her room to ask her to get ready to go soon. I knock on her door. -Alice?- I say. No response, I don't like this. -Alice can you respond please- I say. No response again, I open the door a little and I peek my head around the corner. She's not here, huh? -Alice! Your scaring me!- I say a little louder. -I'm here- I hear coming from the bathroom. -jeez darling don't do that to me again- I say, looking at the bathroom door. -sorry- she whispers. Wait a minute. -it's okey, are you coming?- I ask. -soon- she whispers. I walk to the door,-Open the door- I say, something's wrong. I can feel it. -no ill be downstairs soon- she says. -can you tell me what you are doing?- I ask her. -go away dad please- she says. -be honest- I say. Please don't be doing what I think you are doing. -nothing- she says, I hear her voice crack. -hun, I'm here for you okey? I know life sucks at the moment but it will get better. I promise- I say, she is twelve for fuckssake!. She starts crying loudly, I push the door open, blood is running down her arms and it drips also on the floor. -Nononono- I say, rushing over to her, while she's dropping the razor blade I hug her tight. -IM SORRY- she shouts while crying still. -don't apologize for feeling bad please- I whisper, tears fill my eyes. I kick the blade away so she can't reach for it. -cmon- I say, now im crying too. I take her to her room. She sits on her bed while sobbing I quickly hop to my room to grab a first aid, i go back to Alice. I sit next to her. I take her arm carefully, she lays her head against my shoulder. -whats going on in your head sweetheart?- I ask her. -I'm fat- I whisper. -what? No- I say, I start cleaning the wounds on her arms. -Linda said I am everyday- she says, trying not to cry again. -that's a lie!- I say. I lift her chin up carefully. What the hell?! I see that her right eye is bruised, she always wears hats and the hood of her hoodie so I don't see her eyes much probably. -why is your eye bruised? Did Linda do this?!- I say. She shakes her head. -Nicki- she whispers. -you are going to a other school okey? I'll call your school don't worry- I say, she nods a little. I continue cleaning her wounds. -I don't know what else they said to you but I can talk hours about how special you are- I say, she smiles a little. I get up and leave for a second. I come back with a hoodie. I put her arms in bandages. -would you like me to tell the boys too? So they know?- I ask her. She nods. -okay, here- I say and give her one of my hoodies
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(This one) She nods and goes to the bathroom. -wait- I say, and quickly take the blade out of there. She nods a little, I close the door for her. After she changed her shirt to a hoodie she comes back. -darling, do you have blades somewhere else?- I ask her. She starres at the floor. -you know that I'm not mad, but please be honest- I say. She nods and after a while she shows me where it is. I open a wooden box, Jesus christ, there are like more than twenty blades in here. I sigh. -sorry- she whispers. -nonono, it's not your fault darling- I say. I put the blade from the bathroom in there too. -do you have more blades somewhere else?- I ask. She shakes her head. -okay, I'm gonna go get rid of these, what about we go get you food on the way to the gig? Get you some chicken and rice? You lost alot of blood I think thay your body would like to have some food hm?- I say. She nods. -and ofcourse a milkshake- I say. She smiles a little. I pull her carefully into a hug. She hugs back. -let's go hm?- I say, she nods and actually takes my hand. I wrap my arm around her instead... -it'll get better- I say, she nods a little. After we stepped in my car, I got Rose her favorite food that I told her I'd get her and a drink ofcourse. After that we went to the gig. It went well, I told the guys about her situation