traitor || sonadow angst

xv

TW: SH

Shadow finished "showering", quickly replacing his clothes before Sonic could come in. His legs burned as he wrapped a new layer of gauze over his cuts. Sonic knocked on the door in the midst of his wrapping his thigh.

"Just a sec, I'm like half naked." Shadow chuckled.

"Dude, we're dating."

"Can you just please give me a minute?" Shadow muttered, finishing off the bandaging. "I mean, sorry. You can come in if you want."

Sonic waited before coming in, when Shadow only had pants on and was trying to dry his quills. He wrapped his arms around Shadow's torso, burying his face in his shoulder.

"Thank you for waiting." He whispered, playing with his fingers. We stood in silence, leaving me with my thoughts again.

"Shadow?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too." Shadow said, turning to Sonic. "I remember the last time we said that, and I didn't say I loved you too, but chaos, I really do."

"I know." He murmured.

Shadow held Sonic's cheek in his hand, peering into his eyes.

"I'll never forgive myself for that. I'll never forgive not telling you I loved you, not making you feel special. I'll never let that happen again." A tear rolled down Sonic's face, making Shadow feel horrible. "I-I'm sorry-"

"No, Shadow, it's okay." He chuckled. "Remember that I've never been as happy as I am with you, so please, don't ever blame yourself for my problems."

That was easy for Sonic to say. He knew he ruined Sonic's life, and that was unforgivable.

-----

Things didn't change for weeks. Shadow kept cutting, and Sonic was still oblivious. Well, not completely oblivious. Sonic could tell something was wrong, but he wasn't sure if it was okay to ask him.

Shadow didn't know what to do. He was in so much physical and emotional pain, and all he was doing was burdening Sonic, making things worse. He stumbled out of bed and to the bathrrom, locking the door. Sonic was out with friends. He was alone.

He quickly opened the drawer and grabbed the bloodied knife, not wasting any time to start on his thighs.

He didn't know how many gashes he cut, or how long he was in there, but he knew he fucked up when he heard footsteps outside the door. Sonic's footsteps.

"Shadow?" He scrambled to clean up his mess, but Sonic was already at the door. He hadn't thought to lock it, seeing as Sonic wasn't home. The doorknob turned, and Sonic emerged from the doorway.

They both froze. The knife clattered on the cold, tile floor, as tears rolled down Sonic's face.

"Oh, Shadow..." He gasped.

Shadow's knees wobbled as he collapsed. Sonic sprung over to him, holding his face in his hands.

"No, Sonic-" He stuttered as Sonic tried to clean his wounds. "Don't..."

"W-What? Don't what?" He shrieked. "Don't help you?"

"No, don't help me!"

Sonic was at a loss for words. His lover was bleeding on the floor, and he didn't want to be helped.

"B-but you're bleeding, I need to-"

"You don't need to do anything!" Tears sprung to Sonic's eyes, taken aback by Shadow raising his voice. "Just leave me alone."

Sonic back away, wiping tears from his cheeks.

"I'm s-sorry."