Lucian

Chapter 30

[Madelyn]

"I used to have a babysitter." He begins and my chest tightens at what I think he's going to say. "My parents would work late and they would call her. Chiara. Every day. She used to sneak me chocolate since my parents would not allow me any sweets." He takes a deep breath before continuing. "She used to tell me to kiss her on the cheek to get one. She would take me to my room and I already knew what to do. I kissed her on the cheek and she gave me a chocolate. I was three years old when this started. Years went by and we had a routine. One day when we went up to my room she said she needed a bigger payment. Because this chocolate bar was bigger. I was five. She told me to promise I wouldn't tell anyone. Not a soul."

"Lucian-" I begin but he cuts me off.

"It's fine." He looks at me and almost smiles before looking away. "She told me that she wanted me to kiss her on the lips. I did not think it was weird at the time so I did and this went on and on until she decided that she wanted me to do something else. She wanted me to take off my shirt so that she could kiss my chest. I got uncomfortable but I did it. Before I knew it she came to me every night after I went to bed and told me to take off my pants or she would quit her job. I liked her. I did not want her to quit and I was a sensitive kid. So I did, and she touched me until I somehow fell asleep and I know she did it after too. I did not think it was wrong because she cared for me so she would not hurt me. But, sometimes when I sleep I have dreams of her and when I woke up and you touched me I- I just thought you were her." He casts me a glance. "I am truly sorry, Madelyn." He sounds so sincere and it breaks my heart to think about what happened to him when he was little. It's awful.

"No, I'm sorry. I didn't know.." I whisper and begin shaking my head. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him in for a hug. His strong arms wrap around me and pull me into his lap and we sit like that for a while. It feels good to be held and I think he likes it too. He kisses the back of my head and I hold him impossibly closer to me. And then I just have to open my mouth,"I think I love you." I whisper and I can feel his body tense. An alarm goes off in my head and my chest tightens. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. What if he doesn't love me back? What if I'm coming on too strong.

He eases his grip around me and pulls away but I keep my head down, not meeting his eyes. This is all so stupid- why did I say that?

"Look at me," he says and I do- my heart thumping loudly in my chest. And he's frowning. "You 'think'?" He sounds almost offended and I release the deep breath I was holding. I nod but his frown only deepens. "Why do you 'think'?"

"I- I don't know." I admit and bite my lip to prevent a smile. "It's a big thing to say. I was married to Nick for three years and I never once told him." Lucian's frown seems to ease only a fraction. And there it is- we were married.

"I love you, Madelyn. And I have done for a very long time now." He sounds sincere and his eyes visibly soften and a small smile spreads over his lips. "I love you." He tells me again and my eyes water. He loves me. Is this how it feels to be in love? It never felt like this with Nick. Love.

"I love you too... I think." I say and now he's grinning and the sight makes my heart flutter. And now I'm grinning too, like an idiot. I lean forward and kiss him, both of us smiling.

"Maybe I can make you reconsider your doubts." He mumbles and there it is, a twinkle of desire in his eyes when he's about to do something.

"Maybe," I nod, agreeing and bite my lip. A mischievous smirk takes over his mouth and a shiver runs down my spine even though it's hot in here. He lowers me to the bed and gets on top of me and my heart is thumping loudly against my chest I'm afraid it's going to burst. He brings a hand under my shirt and flicks his thumb over my hard nipple. I draw in a sharp breath and arch my neck.

"Get it off?" He suggests and I grip the hem of my shirt with shaky hands and pull it over up head, tossing it somewhere in his room. He makes a sound from the back of his throat and stares at me with such intensity in his eyes that makes my arm prickle with goosebumps. And my nipples tighten in the cool air.

He leans down and runs his tongue over my hardened bud and grazed his teeth over it, making me gasp. He hooks his hands under the waistband of my underwear and pulls them down, slowly. Teasing and torturing at the same time. I kick them off somewhere in the dark room, too, and he pulls down his pants, revealing him already being thick and hard. I run my finger along the underside of it and it twitches under my touch. I smile and look up at him trying to restrain himself. He brings up a package of condoms but I stop him.

"I want to feel you." I breathe and his eyes turn livid.

"Madelyn-"

"Please, fuck me bare." He groans and doesn't even give me time to brace myself before he spreads my legs and thrusts into me, burying himself deep and I scream. I scratch my nails over his back and he waits for me to adjust before he slowly slides out of me. I dig my nails deeper into his back and he growls and pushes inside of me with the same intensity as before. I scream but the pain is morphing into pleasure and when he sinks inside of me once more it feels good. He presses a gentle kiss over my lips.

"Good girl." He mutters against my lips and heat pools in my lower belly at the praise. He thrust in and out of me in a steady beat and I moan and cry out in pleasure. He growls and buries himself deeper with every thrust and my stomach tightens, every muscle in my body tensing as I come. I scream and he sinks in and out of me a few more times before he comes too. Liquid heat spills deep inside of me and he rolls down beside me, pulling out. Both of us equally breathless.

"Round two?" I suggest and a deep laugh echoes in the room before he's back on top of me, spreading my legs.

"I thought you'd never ask."