Evigilantes

Part 16

Alexander's Pov

Releasing a deep sigh I slowly walk towards Clarke who still hasn't noticed my presence and grab her hand. As she whips her head around I see her red and puffy eyes and I just known she's been crying. 

"Go away Alex " she says as she pulls her hand away and continues throwing stuff in her bag . 

"Clarke please " I try to plead with her but she just ignores me.  Grabbing her hands I pull her into me but she just fight against my hold .

"Go back to your fiance " she yells as she pushes me back and  i feel pain shoots trough my shoulder .

"Can we please talk " I whisper as I fixate my eyes on the floor.  I'm just so ashamed of myself right now i feel like I did the right thing but that doesn't take away that it hurts . 

"You've said everything in your speech to Lexa " she growls at me as she pushes me . Slowly stumbling back I lift my head and feel tears pool in my own eyes but I try to push them away . 

"It's not like that " I say but she just scoffs at me ." So you fuck me and then engage to another girl the day after " she says as she pushes me again . 

"Just leave me the hell alone Alex " she says as she pushes me further away from her . Turning around my back is facing her and I feel a teardrop leave my eye .

"I just hope one day you will forgive me" I whisper and with that I walk out of the tent.  Whipping away the tear I take a deep breath and slowly start to walk towards the bonfire. 

As I reach my empty chair again I sit down and pretty much block everything and anyone out . Seeing my cup is empty I look towards Lexa's and see it is still full so I  grab  and down it .

"Are you alright?" Lexa asks as she puts her hand on my arm and I just give her a nod .

Looking around I see some people are already heading to bed and I wish I could do the same right now because what ever Nyko gave me is starting to wear off and I'm just over this day .

"Let's sleep " Lexa says as if she's heard my thoughts and I give her a nod . As we both stand up we head towards a wooden cabin . As we walk in Lexa start taking her vest and weapons off .

"I'll head back to my own bed " I say as I rub my neck and she just soflty laughs at me .

"Alex we are engaged , what do you think people will believe if we sleep in diffrent beds " she says and to my disappointment she's right.  

"I'm sorry your right " I whisper as I take the vest off , placing it down on the table I try to take my shirt off but it's hard with a fucked up shoulder .

"Let me help you " Lexa says as she moves over to me and all I do is nod at her . Feeling her pull of my shirt I release a small groan at the pain .

"I'm sorry " she says as she pulls away and places the shirt on the table. " it's oke " I whisper as I kick my boots of and look around the cabin and ofcourse to my luck there is only one bed in it .

"You can lay down, you need rest " Lexa says, taking my pants off I lay them on the table  because I'm not sleeping in leather pants.  Walking towards the bed I get in and lay down under the furs and just stare at the ceiling. 

What has my life become i didn't think all of this would happen when I woke up . It just feels like I'm starting to lose myself . It's all becoming to much I wish mom was here to be honest she would know what to do .

Feeling the bed dip next to me I turn around and see Lexa is getting into bed wearing a nightgown? Or whatever you call it . As she gets under the furs I turn around so my back is facing her and just close my eyes .