Deeper Healing

35| Fairy Tale

Leilani Edwards

"We better get inside," Nikolai suggested, lifting himself by his elbows. "It's gonna start raining soon."

With my head still on his chest, I stretched out my hand to the sky and felt more rain droplets than the previous minute. "I like the rain," I hummed, putting my hand down and tilting my face to look up at Nikolai with my hands crossed on his chest.

He cocked an eyebrow, using the knuckles of his right hand to brush my hair off my face. "You wanna get wet?"

I smiled. "Can't a girl live a cliche fairy tale moment at least once in her life?"

"She can," he agreed with a slight twitch of his lips. "As long as she doesn't catch a cold afterwards."

I giggled lightly, planting a soft kiss on his perfectly chiselled jawline. "I'll take that as a yes for both of us."

I lifted myself from him and stood up straight, pulling down my dress a little to adjust its length as it had rolled up my thighs when I lay down. With my smile not fading away for any gloomy reason, I stretched my hand out to him.

"Take my hand," I offered, feeling a chilly shiver run down my spine as light showers started pouring down on us.

Nikolai watched me with graceful intent, the soft smile on his lips that'd easily become familiar convincing me I was the reason for that smile. He was hesitant, just looking at me with some unfamiliar flickers of emotions in his eyes. He had to have many thoughts racing through his mind, doubts even after all the deeply personal information I'd shared with him.

I couldn't tell what he was thinking, but I had faith in his sincerity and the understanding we shared. If sharing part of my demons with him had been as easy as writing in my diary, I could face his reaction and treatment as part of the aftermath.

I preferred it this way than hiding myself from him and only showing him something filtered and unreal, a version of me I preferred showing others. Our relationship had to make a difference. I wanted him to see me for who I was and if he'd choose to judge and drift away, do so before I got too attached to him to let go.

Nikolai sat up straight in a fluid motion, gently placing his hand in mine. I firmly wrapped mine around his, my smile widening like his as I helped him up onto his feet.

As he towered over me, I looked up at him with hopeful eyes, looking for that softness they held before I shared a vulnerable part of my life where I was a broken and helpless girl in a world full of predators and fallen angels.

Standing a foot away for me, Nikolai reached for both of my hands with his. I opened up to him, stretching them out to his touch. We held hands securely, gazing into each other's eyes like they spoke the words our tongues couldn't form and deliver without fault.

"I'm still going to hold your hands especially now more than ever," he promised, holding onto my hands even tighter like they defined the words he spoke. "No matter how dark the facts I know about you become and how much you think you're broken, in my eyes, you're still the woman I care about."

I saw it at that moment, the warmth and softness his gaze usually held when it was fixated on me, only now it held a deeper meaning. A deeper feeling with the weight of a promise punctuating it. He fucking cared and that made me feel a thump so hard in my chest it was close to a full thud.

I swallowed hard, still looking into his eyes when he looped his arm around my back, his hand landing on the small of my back. He took a step closer to me, our bodies lightly touching due to his movement.

I couldn't take my eyes off him, couldn't imagine the things going through that genius mind of his, but what I knew was this was my heart was thumping harder with every passing second and it was his doing.