Deeper Healing

63| The Woman I Love

Leilani Edwards

Riding my motorcycle always gave me a tangible essence of freedom.

With this addictive, indulgent experience, every nerve fibre in my body was assaulted and brought to life with a satisfying rush of adrenaline flooding my veins.

This was me in my raw and passionate form, riding my heart out and feeling it in every pore of my skin that I was my own boss—that I was free and could channel that power to fulfil my dreams.

This was all I ever desired my entire life, what I fought for and worked myself to the bone for and now, I could feel I had way more than what I initially bargained for.

I was happy. I was so fucking happy I could feel it deep inside my bones. I hadn't felt this content and peaceful in a while despite all the horror happening in my life.

Even in my helmet, I couldn't control the grin on my lips. I couldn't control the things I felt and neither did I want to suppress them.

I wanted them to spring free and spread out their wings. I was in love with a man who I felt loved me back with equal intensity or maybe even more. How did a common, troubled girl like me ever get so lucky?

By the time I reached our destination, I still felt a lingering sensation of adrenaline in my bloodstream, my chest heaving and breathing rugged.

I climbed off my motorcycle and took off my helmet, freeing my red hair which I brushed back using my fingers.

Nikolai pulled up right next to me within a few seconds and he climbed off his motorcycle and slipped off his helmet.

I realised he was grinning just as much as I was his hair all messed up. He looked so cute and scalding at the same time my heart swelled with warmth.

"I survived," he announced with a big sigh, hanging his helmet on the handlebar of his motorcycle.

I chuckled, hanging my helmet as well before trotting towards him to fall in for a big hug. He gently squeezed me in, breathing hard against my neck as he tried to catch his breath.

When we pulled away from each other, I left my arms looped around his neck, gazing into his eyes.

Even underneath one of the most beautiful night skies I'd ever seen and a view to die for, his eyes were still the most enchanting thing I found myself getting lost in and drawn to.

He was so full of life, love and everything heartwarming in between. I couldn't just see it in his eyes or the way he smiled at me. I could feel it in his gentle but possessive touch and I could feel it in every little move he made.

"Now I get why you're so crazy about motorcycles," he breathed, following my eyes with one of his hands holding me in place by the small of my back.

"You do?" I chuckled, recalling how much of a bumpy ride the first few minutes had been.

He'd been understandably a bit hesitant and slow, pulling off from the road altogether at some point, but he'd quickly gotten the hang of it.

I knew it was a sacrifice on his part to do this with and for me since he'd never really imagined himself doing this at any point in his life before he met me. Maybe that was why tonight felt so special.

"I do," he responded, leaning in to softly kiss me on my forehead. "You're smiling so much tonight and it's beautiful. I'd ride with you all over again if it means I get to see you this happy every second."

"Only you make me smile this much, Nik," I told him sincerely. "It's not really the ride or the beautiful night. It's you. You're my happy place and I intend to be yours with every breath that I take."