Infinity♾️

23🤎

Rue

When I got back home I made it even as far as to unpack without shedding another tear, it wasn't until I got in the shower and let my Spotify library roam that I broke finally. Olivia Rodrigo started to play. I was okay until I started over-analyzing the lyrics.

I cried in there for what seemed like hours. It's so much going through my head I can't be upset about just one thing, I'm upset about it all as a whole.

That whole week being back I didn't do a thing but my finals and sit in my room listening to my records. It's the only thing I could do that didn't make me think about her. She hadn't been in class at all that first week, I figured she was still visiting her family.

Once our schedule changed I had more classes with Kaleb. We got to talk more. I'm so glad we can still be just friends, I hate losing relationships of any sort. Lottie knows something is up but she's giving me my space and so is Simon.

The second week I still only was able to go to class and come home but this time I could only write, eat and sleep. I only had one record left to listen to and it was the record she bought me, I refused to listen to it. I don't need to be set back. I took it from my room and sat it on the coffee table in the living room, it makes good decor. My tutoring sessions still weren't in need, no one had signed up yet.

The third week, I still hadn't seen her. I started to worry. I so badly wanted to ask where she was but it's best not to. Kaleb and I went to another open mic night at that cafe, It was beautiful. That same week Lottie and I went shopping in the town over. I also picked up going to the gym. I want to shed a few pounds before the summer, all that laying around and eating caught up to me.

I got back to the Shelter, now three days a week. Ms. Nia asked about her, I was able to say her name without bursting into unnecessary tears. That third week I really had been in a good head space.

The fourth week I still hadn't seen her and I started to worry. I asked Simon about it while we were in my Dad's class, excuse me, Professor Sutton. He hates when I call him daddy in class. I never knew how great of a professor he was until I was his student. Now I see why he's so highly recommended.

I got out almost every day that week. I even went to one of Simon's parties with Kaleb. I had fun with him and the group. I may have asked Simon where Kathleen was. He said she's been in Germany with her family still. He said she'd be coming back but he didn't know when. Hopefully not soon, I'm still too weak to face her. One sweet word and I know I'll fall right back into her arms like nothing ever happened. Only if she allowed me.

Maybe she was only placed in my life to help me, maybe she was never meant to stick around. Either way, I'm grateful for the things she's taught me in our short time together.

♾️

Kaleb, Simon, and I are walking into my Dad's class and talking about the weekend that occurred. We had attended parties Friday and Saturday then had a 'hangover' brunch/picnic yesterday. You just had to be there.

"What did you two do after the picnic?" Simon asked.

"We went to Mom and Dad's house to watch movies with Lillian. He's never met her and I missed her so much. Look at the pictures I took." I said showing him the photos as we walked to our seats.

"You all had an eventful weekend I take it?" I heard from behind us. She has this class with us too huh?

Simon immediately scooped her into a bear hug. "I've fucking missed you." He spun her around.

"I missed you too Si. Put me down, I'm losing street credit as we speak." She laughed.

Simon wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "You missed so much."