Fates Entwined (A TodoBaku ff) ✔

LIII

Shoto awoke the next morning feeling rather strange. His body felt, despite the sluggish hands of sleep trying to pull him down, oddly lighter. His shoulders still felt tense, and his head was the same as always, and the aches and pains in his limbs were still there... and yet, it felt like there was more space in his chest. Like he could breathe easier.

When he sat up and spent a moment watching the falling snow, drifting and dancing down from the pale blue sky, he didn't feel the usual pull of the cold as strongly as before, like his body was content to be warm without forcing a constant chill. It was odd indeed. 

As always he washed and dressed, but as he walked through the halls of the castle, passing an open window with snow nestling along its base, the fur neck of his cloak didn't have to protect him from an icy chill. He hardly felt it at all. He found the same thing happened when he walked past the entrance doors, the harsh wind feeling more like a gentle breeze. It was an odd sensation, that the cold, although always comforting, didn't have its sharp bite as it often did when he pushed down his fire too far, leaving his core as cold as ice. He wasn't sure how to feel, that his father's power was actually something helpful not painful.

He was stuck in contemplation over breakfast, and his friends seemed to notice his pensive behaviour, for they greeted him with their bright smiles but didn't try to engage him in conversation unless he actively participated himself. Midoriya poured him a cup of tea, and he was surprised that it burnt him when it touched his lips; looking down at his left hand that was holding the cup, he noticed that it was a lot warmer than usual. In fact, his left side felt warmer overall. It seemed it would take some time for his body to adjust to both sides taking up space equally, and once again he wasn't sure how to feel. Now that he had used his power, had shown Katsuki his fire, he would have to be constantly focused on making sure he didn't let it get out of hand. He didn't want another glacier incident but with a burnt ceiling instead. 

But the idea of using his fire, of using it as a weapon against people just like his father, made the warmth become a suppressive heat, his gut twisting uncomfortably. He had seen what those flames can do, the destruction they can cause, and he didn't know whether he would end up on the same path as his father should he indulge in such power. These thoughts stayed with him throughout the morning, and he tried to put all his focus onto the sword in his hand as he wielded it in demonstration. The cold metal in his cold palm, heavy yet balanced...

That evening, after a walk with Momo to the lake, he found himself restless in bed, tossing and turning yet unable to find a comfortable position. His anxieties from the day were yet to desert him, and so here he was standing by the window, watching the forest in peaceful slumber and night owls drift seamlessly through the starry sky. The night was cold and the snow had stopped, the air sharp and still. 

Every so often he would find a nighttime creature dipping in and out of the forest edge or scurrying along the path. A pair of foxes playing chase, or a small hedgehog finding its next meal. He thought about taking another walk by himself, yet past experience made him hesitate as he neither wanted to get lost nor be stabbed again. He sometimes thought about taking a midnight walk in the gardens back in Endeavour, where the fireflies he couldn't spot in the day would dance along the flowers and bushes, but knowing there would be many eyes on him, making sure he wouldn't run away, meant he found greater solace in the solitude of his room. 

He imagined it would be rather nice to take a nighttime walk in the summer, where even as the sun disappeared the sky was light and the moon bright as always. There would be so many flowers, new species he had never seen before, and people would be out until late drinking and dancing to celebrate anything and everything. He imagined Katsuki staying out until late at the tavern with his friends, drinking and dining and then being so drunk he would decide to go swimming in the lake, pondweed getting caught in his drenched hair. The thought made him chuckle quietly, imagining him laughing freely without the weight of his duties bearing him down. Without this war...