Santana came back a few minutes later with an ice pack. She held it gingerly to Brittany's head.
The blonde had slowly sat up, her back laying against the bed frame. She smiled soothingly, eyes still red. "Don't worry San, I'm fine. It's just a little bump. It will heal."
Santana bit her lip, worry gnawing at her. "I threw you on the ground, Brittany! I don't know what came over me, I-"
Brittany shushed her with a hug. "I know that we went too fast. I know that I must have pushed a boundary." She pulled back. "I'm sorry, San. It's my fault. Please don't feel guilty."
Santana only stared, tears pooling in her eyes.
Brittany laid a comforting hand on Santana's thigh.
And suddenly Santana's breathing was quickening again, tears still flowing on her face. Brittany pulled her into an embrace, and Santana let her. She was sobbing, once again, in her best friend arms, having fully made out with her and pushed her off the bed.
"I'm a mess", Santana cry-laughed into Brittany's shoulder. Brittany rubbed her back in circles, quietly.
And, when it was over, Brittany was still there looking at her with all the patience and the love in the world.
Santana sniffled. "Brittany, I- thank you."
Brittany gently smiled.
"I'm a mess and I'm dragging you into it."
Brittany shook her head vehemently, but Santana carried on, oblivious, her eyes stubbornly fixing a spot on the floor.
"I don't know what we are, what we've been doing, Brit, but I- I can't. I don't want to hurt you any further than I already have. You deserve somebody who's whole. Who loves you, who cherishes you the way you deserve. And I- I'm not capable of that right now."
"It's okay", Brittany soothed. "It's okay", she repeated, a sob breaking in her voice. "I'll still be there if you need me."
"I'm sorry", Santana choked, seeing the tears in Brittany's eyes. "I'm sorry that I can't be who you need me to be. I'm sorry that-"
"Shh", Brittany interrupted.
Santana gathered her remaining courage to finish her sentence. "I'm sorry that I'm so lost."
"That I'm so afraid", she murmured.
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Never again (Quinntana)
FanfictionSantana only ever cared about one person. When Lucy left her, without even saying goodbye, Santana vowed to never get hurt again. She shut everyone out, as she strove to forget everything about her first love. What happens, though, when Santana's p...
