Step-brothers ||BTS FF

Chapter 32

"The power of positive thinking." She read the name of his book cover and settled on the empty seat beside him.

She caught him off guard with her sudden presence.

Namjoon was very focused on reading his book somewhere in the corner of their home library. He was all alone until Y/N entered the place as her first stop, trying to look for him. She had already figured he would be in the library since reading was what he enjoyed doing during his free time.

He gave her his dimpled smile before putting the book down on his lap.

"I'm guessing you've read this one too?"

she giggles.

"You'd be surprised because I haven't. I have it on my to-read list, though."

He was utterly shocked. It was his first time hearing from her that she hadn't read a book he was reading or was going to read. Not long after, his shocked face turned into an excited grin.

"Oh my, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity I would not miss out on. Want to read this together? I've just started reading it." He offered it in a very exciting and joyous tone. She laughed at his childish act.

"Oppa, no offence. But you really sound like a child trapped in an adult's body right now," she smiled, not minding it at all. She was rather happy with this side of him.

He scratched his nape in slight embarrassment.

"Well, to answer your question, yes, for sure, I would love to read this book with you."

She scooted closer to him and leaned over, looking over his book when he picked it up again.

It had been three hours since they had started to read, and they still were.

It was really peaceful and quiet.

As they continued to read, Namjoon took a glance at Y/N. He saw how focused and engaged she was in reading. She wore a slight frown as she flicked through the pages.

"Y/n..." he softly called out.

"Hmm?" she replied, not moving her eyes away from the book.

"I don't think I've asked you this before, but what are your plans for your future?"

She was stunned by his sudden question. She finally moved her eyes away from the book and looked up at him, who was already looking down at her.

She deepened her frown.

He ruffled her hair and put the book down again on his lap.

"You really want to know?" She looks away and gulps a huge lump.

"Of coarse! Why, what's wrong with that?" he chuckled.

"Nothing. It's just that I've never spoken about my future plans to anyone other than Lisa and Mom before."

"Woah. Well, I'll gladly be your third listener. Speak out... Also another once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to tease Jungkook on that. That guy brags about you too much—honestly, I don't blame him; I'd do the same." They both laugh. "C'mon, speak to me."

She takes a deep breath before speaking.

"My aim is Cambridge."

His eyes widen.

"Cambridge University?" She steadily nods at his shocked figure.

The girl had always aimed high. No matter what.

And it would not be a shock if she did get into Cambridge. She had already gotten into South Korea's most highly educated school.

"The one in London?" he faintly asks, hoping for a no for an answer.

His hopes all crash down when she nods, her head hanging low, saying yes.

It was exactly at this moment that he felt lonely. He felt the fear of losing a person he sincerely and dearly loved.

Yes, he was very proud of her high aims and her hard work to achieve them, but a small part of him was being selfish. He did not want to let her go away from him after she had just brought back the light in his dark world. He feared stepping into the dark again. And he knew it would definitely happen without her presence.

"I just want to get a degree in architecture there and then proceed to start my own firm after a year of experience."

He gives her a sad smile.

"That means in two years time you'll be gone." His heart shattered at his own words escaping his lips.

"Is that all you thought of after I opened up to you about my dreams?" She kept blinking, still processing.

"It's the truth, though," he said, his eyes having slightly started to water.

"Yh, but no appreciation? No more asking about my ideas? just straightly, 'That means in two years time you'll be gone.'" She projected the same words he said a few moments ago, exactly in his tone.

Right after that, she burst out laughing.

If we are being honest, she was upset to leave them herself; she had the same fear he did, which was to lose someone she loved, but she was more sad to see him get sad because of her.

So she made an attempt to ease the gloomy atmosphere.

"Jesus, oppa. There is still so much time until I leave," she said, wrapping her arm around his thick shoulders.

That only made him more emotional.

"Oppaaa, You honestly should be proud of me... I'm following your footsteps."

He remained silent. She sighed.

"See. This is exactly why I don't talk about my future plans. It's fine, Oppa. If it makes you happy, I'll just stay back, and I can just look for a university here."

"No. No Y/n. Don't be so selfless. You want me to be happy, right? Then go archive your dreams; that will not only make me the happiest but the proudest brother too." This time, he spoke, looking directly into her eyes.

Their eyes were both red.

Each of them reflected the same pain.

They both feared losing someone dear to them.

It really is hard to wait for something you know might not happen, but it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want.

There are many people out there who are afraid to lose people they love, and that really sometimes makes them wonder, 'Is there someone who is afraid to lose them?'.

A huge part of life is that it is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.

For sure, you are entitled to make whatever choice you want, but you are never free from the consequences of that choice.

Every choice comes with a consequence. Once you make a choice, you must accept responsibility. You cannot escape the consequences of your choices, whether you like them or not.

This was the same with Y/n.

She had no fears about speaking out about her dream back when she was in London, because that was before her mom beamed with her wedding dress on and clung against her ultra-rich second husband, who had seven world-famous sons.

Back then, she was unaware that her life would take such an interesting turn. Though she was certain her mom had met someone from the glimpse she had caught of her giggling and blushing at her phone, she did not know it would turn out to be South Korea's most famous businessman, who had South Korea's biggest boy band members as his sons.

Even more, she was oblivious to whether she could ever bond with any of them.

Except she did. They did.

As time passed, she hadn't realised until today that they had become one of the most important people in her life. She had just realised that she would not be able to live a day without them.

And this had all happened in just a few months.

Before them, she was positive that she wanted to go to Cambridge to start off with the first stage of her dreams.

But things seemed to have taken a twist.

She was afraid to leave the place she had come back to.

She was afraid to be away from people who were dear to her.

She was rethinking whether she even wanted to go to Cambridge University anymore.

'May your choices reflect your hope and not your fears.'

If she chose to stay back, that meant her dream would crash down. If she chose to go, she'd be separated from her loved ones for quite some time.

"Y/N." His numb hands grabbed hers. "If there is anything I have ever learned in my life, that is to follow my dreams. No matter what. Don't care about the rest; just do what pleases you. You have to be selfish once in your lifetime, or there is no point in having your own life. Yes, it'll hurt to see you go, but what's the worst? It's not like you're going forever, right?"

Namjoon totally understood her. He understood how she felt because he himself was once her. Not ready to leave his loved ones.

But he knew he had to do it for himself and for his family.

He was just the starting point for BTS's existence. He was made the leader.

And thanks to him, he picked being in a group rather than going solo.

Now, when he looks back, he does not regret a single decision he made all the way along.

A tiny yet visible smile made its way onto her face.

"Of course not. And we've still got like two years to spend together; let's make the most of it," he nods.

"For sure. And I promise we'll come to frequently visit you, but you've got to make a promise too."

"No boys, and always contact us. Please tell me that's all of it." He bursts out laughing.

"Maybe there is more, but we've got a long way to go; there's no point discussing this now; what if you forget?"

"True actually. What if I don't get in?" she shrugs.

"HEY! Believe in yourself."

They laugh together as he ruffles her hair again.

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