It's so easy // slash (completed)

twenty

"so, i heard you lost the baby?" rue questioned, before stuffing her mouth full of cotton candy ice cream. "i did, yeah" i sighed. "does that mean you're never gonna have a baby?" she questioned.

"no, no, i'll still have one someday...i'm just not super ready right now" i smiled. "oh" she nodded. "do you love slash?" "of course i do, i love him with my entire heart" i smiled.

we were currently sitting in the ice cream shop at the mall where i had met slash for the first time. the mall was quiet tonight, it felt like we were the only ones here.

"i miss you" rue frowned. "im right here" i chuckled. "no, i miss when you lived with us" she sighed. "i know you do, but you know you're welcome to come over whenever you want" i explained.

"its not the same" she mumbled, picking at her treat. "you better eat that before it melts" i spoke. "yeah" she nodded, taking a spoonful.

"hows school though?" i questioned. "its whatever" she shrugged. "listen rue, i know you're not happy about me being gone, but im moving forward with my life, and im proud of where i am" i mentioned.

"i know" she sighed. "there's gotta be something happy about your life....any boys you like?" i teased, trying to bring up her mood. "the only boy i liked was duff" she huffed.

"rue, he's more than 10 years older than you" i laughed. "i dont care" she shrugged. "you'll find someone...maybe not when you're nine, but trust me, it'll happen" i nodded.

"do you think im stupid?" rue suddenly asked. "of course not...why would you think that?" i asked. "cause mommy got mad at me for something, and then she called me stupid" she frowned.

"fucking mom" i mumbled under my breath. i could relate to rue. mom treated me the same way when i was her age, i remember all of it. "i'll talk to her" i smiled.

we finished up our ice cream and i brought her back home. "i love you a lot laila" rue sighed, wrapping her arms around me. "i love you too, rue" i smiled.

"you better get inside before they wonder where you are" i spoke. "yeah....bye sissy" she waved, opening the front door. in seconds, it closed, making me let out a sigh.

i got back into my car and rested my head back. i wasnt quite ready to go home yet. maybe a drive would be good to clear my mind.

i drove through the streets of l.a, until i ended up in the hills. i settled on a lookout and turned off my car. i reached into the backseat before grabbing a blanket and setting myself on the hood

all i could do was let out a sigh as i faced the lit up city. there was no silence between all the sirens, loud cars, or drunk people yelling.

it was peaceful though- being alone. i had been so afraid of being alone the past while, i guess i just forgot what it was like. i missed this feeling.

"better not waste time" i mumbled, pulling out a joint from my pocket. i lit it up and took an inhale. as soon as i exhaled, i felt all the stress melt away from me.

within minutes, i was high. high enough to function, but i didnt want to drive. "i could stare at this all day" i mumbled as a smile appeared on my pale face.

not long later, tiredness took over me. i climbed back into the car and rested my head back. "eh a nap wont hurt" i mumbled shutting my eyes.