Glass & Roses (BBC Ghosts)

|xxix|

S4E6: Not Again

O0o~~o0O

Lucille was heavily regretting attending Birthmark Club; she did have a birthmark but it was located the back of her left shoulder and not dangerously close to her waistline like some other people. She didn't know why Julian even attended the thing, he did have one, he claimed, but it would leave him with practically zero clothes on other than the sock and garters. None of them wanted to see that, so he was forbidden from showing it off.  At least Humphrey was here, he kept her sane.

"Fine, fine. Let's just call Birthmark Club a partial success." Pat said, buttoning his shirt back up. 

Robin came running through the room, hollering something about a bear in the Breakfast Room. Lucille mulled that over for a second, how on earth was there a bear in the breakfast room.

"And I shall follow up on that rumour on Lady B later." Pat continued, ignoring Robin. 

"Left buttock." Kitty said. Lucille didn't want to know how Kitty had potentially found that one out.

"There's a bear in the Breakfast Room." Captain stated, popping his head round the door.

"What?!" Pat exclaimed, turning abruptly to the now empty door.

"Ooh, oooh, interesting." Thomas murmured.

"A bear?" 

"A real life bear?"

"Very exciting..." Humphrey said, watching as they all left to find out more. "For people with legs."

"Oh, come along, Humphrey. Shan't have you missing out on all the fun." Lucille scooped him into her arms before rushing after everyone else.

The Captain led them all into the Breakfast Room, smugly. Alison and Mike were having a wee bit of an argument over the bear.

"Oh yeah. 'Oh, have you seen the giant bear, darling?' 'Yeah, it put me off my breakfast.'" Alison complained.

"Rubbish. It just needs, like, sprucing up, you know? I'm telling you, this thing is sick." Mike was clearing the one who had procured the bear, and definitely not before asking Alison if he could.

"What?" Alison honestly couldn't believe him.

"Sick? I think it might be dead." Kitty stated. "Should someone tell him?"

"Er, no. He doesn't literally mean sick, Kitty." Julian explained. "It's sort of American street slang. You know, you say something negative when you mean something positive."

"Someone better not let Fanny see this, she'll be screaming the house down." Lucille stated, as she and Humphrey joined the other three in looking at the bear a bit more closely.

"I think it might be one of the few times her and Alison were in agreement." Humphrey added.

"Me too." Lucille adjusted him in his arms. "All done looking at it?"

"Yeah. It's a bit freaky. Can you put me on the piano in the living room?"

"Not at all Humphrey." Lucille walked off to do so, being joined by several of the other ghosts who took a seat around the empty fire.

"Morally bankrupt, eh?" Julian called after the Captain.

"Uh oh." Lucille muttered, jumping to sit on the piano and watch this argument go down. It was a well known fact that none of the ghosts would ever go to Julian for any kind of advice, romantic, moral, etc. etc. mainly due to the whole bad political schemes he came up with in parliament.