Me and nick became very close the first week of school. He sat with me during lunch, we talked in class, we spent free period together. He really opened up to me about his home life. His mom is single and has two jobs. He also has an older sister, Nicole. She's moved out but helps pay bills. Nicks been making money with his football games. People donate to a fund they think is for hungry kids but it's really to help nicks family. He justified tricking people with the claim that he is a hungry kid so it doesn't count as lying.
During the weekend nick invited me to his house. I gladly excepted. I put on a lose shirt and shorts. Nothing to nice. I made sure my hair looked perfect. I don't know why, I just really wanted Nick to think I look good. I drove to his house and knocked in the door. Nick opened it and smiled widely at me.
"Karl! I'm so happy you came, here come in" he said moving to the side.
I walked into the house and looked around. It was nice, the house had a blue colour theme and the decorations matched the paint colour perfectly. He showed me to his room and closed the door behind us. I looked around the room, it was similar my room. I desk, twin sized bed, dresser with a mirror. It was just missing a full body mirror.
"Your house is really nice" I said smiling at him
"Thanks, we try to make it look nice. My mom hates when it looks messy, she says a messy house makes you look Poor" nick sighed sitting on the bed.
"Make yourself comfortable" he said sitting up a bit
I took my shoes off and sat down next to him. He stared at me for a few seconds. He made a face at him and he quietly turned away embarrassed. I giggled a bit. We talked about school and the teachers we hated, then we talked about why schools the worst.
"So what are your friends like?" I asked changing the subject
"Oh they're the best! I've known clay ever since I was 13 we met on Minecraft. Me and George met when I was 14, he was clays friend and clay thought we'd get along. And then there's Alex, we met last year we hooked up at a party and then became friends." Nick said a stupid smile on his face
"Is Alex a boy or girl?" I asked nervously. For some weird reason I was hoping the Alex was a boy
"You aren't homophobic right?" He asked
"No of course not! I'm gay!" I blurted. "I mean, sorry"
"No it's okay! I'm also gay, well- bisexual" he said making me calm down a bit
"Oh, well was Alex a boy?" I asked
"He's a boy" nick said
"Oh, was he your first time?" I asked quitely
"No, a boy I met in 8th grade was" nick said raising an eyebrow
"Have you had your first time yet?" He asked
"No." I sighed
"What? Your 17 and haven't had sex?" He laughed at me
"Shut up!" I said embarrassed
"Make me" he said getting closer and holding my chin up with my face.
"I-" I had no idea how to react
"That's what i thought" he said pulling away
"Whatever! Who was your first kiss?" I asked looking away
"Some girl I met in 7th grade. I don't remember her name, I just remember her being a asshole" nick shrugged
"How many people have you dated?" I questioned
"Oh god a million, I dated most of my 8th grade class, I was desperate for attention back then" he said
"I've never dated anyone before" I said
"Have you had your first kiss?" He asked
"No"
"Do you want to?"
He leaned in and kissed me, I kissed him back. He pulled back just enough that our lips weren't touching. He looked at my eyes, staring at them.
"You aren't that bad at kissing" he giggled
"I never claimed to be bad" I smirked
He pulled me into another kiss pulling me onto his lap. My hands moved to his hair and lock onto it, his hands held my waist squeezing it a little but not to hard. The way he held me made me feel safe. We both pulled away breathing heavily.
"It's obvious you've never kissed before" he said giggling
"I'm not that bad!" I giggled before kissing him again
I started kissing his neck, I was worried that I was doing it wrong but he pulled me closer which was my sign that he liked it. I kept kissing him all over his neck, I wanted more of a reaction from him so I moved up a bit to a spot just below his ear. He let out a heavy breath. I attacked the spot earning a moan from him as he squeezed my waist tighter. I pulled away and looked at him smiling. I've never felt this before.
He picked me up as he stood up, he pushed me against a wall and slammed our lips together. I wrapped my legs around him as we kissed. My hands pulled on his hair as we kissed. He pushed his tongue against my teeth, I alouded excess. He explored my mouth, every inch. We pulled away again gasping for air as we stared into each others eyes. He moved us to the bed and set me down on it lightly. He took his shirt off. I looked at his body soaking up how beautiful he was. He got on top of me and slightly sat on my waist. I could feel my self get hard as he lowered his weight onto me. His hands moved to under my shirt and suddenly everything felt like it was in slow motion.
I don't want him to see my body, I look horrible. I felt my breath start to pick up. I was hyperventilating. I look like a mess. What if he finds me disgusting? What if he tells everyone how ugly I am? My eyes were fixated on his hands moving my shirt.
"Karl? Are you okay? You're hyperventilating" nick said worried. My eyes shifted up to his.
"I don't know- I I can't breath" I said feeling my chest get heavy.
He got off me and put his shirt back on. He helped me sit up right. I felt his hand hold onto mine. He looked at me with fear on his face. I took in a few deep breaths and calmed down enough that I could talk.
"Are you okay?"
YOU ARE READING
Who am I?
FanfictionThis is the story of Karl jacobs trying to find himself and learn who he is Death Self harm Eating disorders Disassociation disorder (?) Body dysmorphia Homophobia Transphobia And other touchy topics The emotions and stuff my be over dramatic btw...