The Undercroft. Reader x Sebastiansallow

Fears in Flames, Part four

Y/N POV

it was a rose but not any topical red or pink rose but it was blue, Sebastian had enchanted the small plant in a frozen like state the icicles made it look like it was glittering, "it's beautiful" I took it and examined every small detail from petal to petal from the stem to the small leaves

"is this real or"

"it's a real pain in the ass is what it is, you my dear have some serious expensive tastes one seed 50 galleons was able to charm my way down to 30"

"but how did you manage to grow it so perfectly"

"you doubt my planting ability"

"No of course not but Sebastian it takes years and years of care and patience and"

" professor Garlick was able to provide the perfect environment for the plant and keep watch on it during classes I spent every full moon tending to it a few times i thoughts I killed it because I forgot to water it once but it managed to survive"

The pain I had felt since drinking the potion melted away and my heart was beating very fast, "so this is what you've been doing all this time? Those night time adventures you were"

"Tending to the most stubborn plant i have ever known yes, it was like looking after Ominis except without the bitching"

I smiled "thank you Sebastian"

"And that Charm on it should last until my dying breath"

I rolled my eyes "how romantic, a plant that will tell me if you've snuffed it, just want I always wanted" I said sarcastically

He smiled at me which made my heart sink, the feeling of dread and pain as returning and I could stop the tears flowing back down my face again "Hey, what's going on, you can tell me" Sebastian lifted my head up to stare deep into his eyes, "it's just, i have this awful feeling that we shouldn't be doing this" he looked at me confused "doing what?"

"THIS being together, I just feel like you might be thinking I'm using you"

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

I moved backwards away from him and as I did I felt my heart ache when I saw Sebastian's face fall, was I really going to break his heart and on Christmas, he had been through so much was I really going to end it all here and now?

"It's not fair, it's not fair on you and it's not fair on me, you deserve better"

"I don't understand"

"Oh Merlin, i fucked it up"

"Fucked what up?"

"Us our friendship, if I had just held back my temptations, I wouldn't be feeling this way"

"Your having regrets" Sebastian's chest rose and fell very heavy and it as like see through a window in his heart I could see it slowly down struggling to pump blood into his body

"No, maybe, I don't know, at first i felt it was the right thing to do but then you kept come back and I wanted you more and more and then I thought you only wanted me for the sex and"

"That's not true"

"But then I didn't care because if felt so good but then it felt wrong but I didn't care because the things you made me feel was.. was" my body shattered I couldn't bring myself to say anymore, Sebastian approved me and I stood my ground, "it's probably best that you leave me, before I hurt you" he ignored me instead he cupped my face and pressed his lips on mine, I felt lost in the feeling of this passionate Exchange of affection it was like I was kissing him for the first time, as our lips parted our eyes met his forehead again mine "I don't care how many times you hurt me, I'm not leaving you" his words filled my heart and yet my mind was racing "but I don't want to hurt you" I whispered "I want you to listen to me very carefully" he took a deep breath "the moment you walked through those doors during the sorting ceremony last year, I knew there was something special about you nothing to do with your ability to see and use ancient magic but something extraordinary, and I was right the day we duelled that when I knew I was right, I didn't hesitate to except the invitation to take you to Hogsmeade and then we fought that troll and you just blew me away, besting me in a deal was one thing but defeating a fully grown troll, now that was impressive" I laughed softly as he brushed my cheek "then you told me about your magic ability to see and weld ancient magic and I was so touched that you could trust me with such a secret that I would of kept it to the grave if you asked me to, then our adventures began and I watched you defeating dark wizards and goblins, squishing giant spiders literally squashing them under your boot, it was bloody incredible, and then the day you confronted me about being friends with a goblin, I didn't know what came over me I was so forced on finding a cure for Anne that I didn't care about anything else not releasing the dangerous you yourself were putting yourself through to not only understand your magic but you also found time to find a way to help my sister to help me, I was fool to call you ignorant I regret the moment you left and then you came back and you stood by my side the whole time even after everything I did after everything I put you through you came back, I fell so hard for you that day, I knew I felt something between us but this was different it was real I want it to be real" he moved my hair out of my face and his eyes fell on the mark on my cheek "I promised myself that day I would never use never involve myself in dark magic after what I did to my uncle what I did to you, I honestly thought you would of hated me for what I did but you surprised me, you convinced Ominis not to tell the headmaster or the Ministry what happened that day and I vowed to make it up to you to the both of you" a tear ran down his face as he struggled to continue "then we parted that summer, I couldn't cope being alone in that house but I had no where else to go, Anne was gone you weren't writing to me, ominis and I were at each other's throats, I found myself constantly getting drunk to stop feeling the pain I did thinking you'd never forgive me even though you gave me your word that you've never let anyone take me away, and then I saw you at kingscross oh how I wanted to embrace you to hold you close to me to feel you to kiss you, but I also felt ashamed I felt as if I were a burden to you, so I kept my distance but I just couldn't resist being around you it was too painful, and when I finally had the courage to do all those things, you are like poison to me, even though you tell me to stop I won't stop drinking" his breath shuddered and I look down at the rose still in my hands "so when I say I'm not leaving you, I mean it, you can push me away, curse me, lock me up, run away but I know I will never stop wanting you" I couldn't help it, I kissed his like I had never kissed him before and wrapped my around his neck pulling myself closer to him, "I still think this is wrong" I whispered as our lips parted "but it feelings good right?" I felt his lips press against mine again more passionately "very".