After

The bad and the good

Tw chapter
Mentions of self harm

Anna's pov
It had been a couple months now since me and Carson broke up, I was better. I was doing okay finally out of the few months I got closer to my uncle Jeremiah I tell him literally everything he's like my best friend besides my sister
Jeremiah was there when my parents couldn't be I trusted him with my life I wish I knew he would tell them before I told him as he said he was protecting me I didn't tell him at first but eventually I did.

It was cool out, nearly summer again I was laying out on the beach chairs when the message came through

????- go slit your wrists you fucking good for nothing slut

I never let things get to me after all I am a Conklin fisher but the messages kept going from once a week to every day

??- if you don't do it I'll make your life hell

??- no one wants you

It only gets worse from there and I couldn't control it you know that voice inside your head that tells you to not listen but you have the bigger voice that always wins. It won. That night when everyone went to sleep I searched endlessly for anything sharp and I did it the first line I made across my pale skin felt amazing and I begged for me

1 cut turned to 2 then to 3 and I was covered blood dripping of my skin on to the hard floor I felt free I felt okay again

I thought it would only be that one time it would happen but I was wrong it kept happening the hunger for more. The pain felt nice but I realised then I needed help

Result of doing it I had to hide my skin in 100 degree weather I can't go in the pool nothing I was really struggling and scared to go to my parents I knew I had to go to the one person I trust the most even if that meant he would tell my parents. Jeremiah.

If your in need please reach out your not alone

Samaritans – for everyone
Call 116 123
Email jo@samaritans.org
Information:
Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM)
Call 0800 58 58 58 – 5pm to midnight every day
Visit the webchat page
Information:
Papyrus – prevention of young suicide HOPELINE247
Call 0800 068 41 41
Text 07860 039967
Email pat@papyrus-uk.org
Information:
Childline – for children and young people under 19
Call 0800 1111 – the number will not show up on your phone bill
Information:
SOS Silence of Suicide – for everyone
Call 0300 1020 505 – 4pm to midnight every day
Email support@sossilenceofsuicide.org
Message a text line

If you do not want to talk to someone over the phone, these text lines are open 24 hours a day, every day.

Information:
Shout Crisis Text Line – for everyone

Text "SHOUT" to 85258
Information:
YoungMinds Crisis Messenger – for people under 19

Text "YM" to 85258
Talk to someone you trust

Let family or friends know what's going on for you. They may be able to offer support and help keep you safe.

There's no right or wrong way to talk about suicidal feelings – starting the conversation is what's important.

Who else you can talk to

If you find it difficult to talk to someone you know, you could:

call a GP – ask for an emergency appointment
call 111 out of hours – they will help you find the support and help you need
contact your mental health crisis team – if you have one