𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐄

Comfort and hug

Josh

She started crying out loud, on her knees, her face red , drenched with tears.
She started telling me that he is only a friend and she was scared of punishment that's why she lied to me, but why is she telling me all this now, as if I care !.
"Don't treat me like this please I'm not a whore sir please" she joined both of her hands and begged.

She is this much hurt from being called a whore, she is not hating me for beating the hell out of her, instead she is saying sorry to me and I know she wasn't cheating on me;why are you so innocent, you are making me weak.

I looked at her but all she is doing is crying ,her face showed pain, she's hurt and looking at her infront me like this, crying, on knees, joined hands, hiccups and when she put both of her hands on her chest ,I can't, she's too young to suffer this much.
I myself have to give up , I pulled her into my arms and rubbed her back, she's still crying.
I don't get her, how can she be so innocent, I'm the animal here, I mistreated her and she's confronting me about her lie and that too because she was afraid.
Isn't it my fault too that she can't even tell me truth.
And she said she doesn't want me to treat her like this, like what?.
Have I treated her any better in this past months, why is she like this; she is making me weak..
"I'm n...ot a w.ho.re, I ne.ver wan..ted to hurt y.our f...feeli..ngs" her words were like rain on my wilted heart.
She still care about my feelings , when all I cared about is myself I ;why?.

And I know these eyes,they are not lying, they hold honesty.
In a moment she healed something that was broken for so long,like in past four years this is the first time , I felt my lost heart beat.

I hugged her, like she'll disappear and I'll be same as before again; without a heartbeat.
She timidly clutch on the hem of my shirt and I let her, if in this moment she'll wrap her arms around me , I'll let her do that too.
"I believe you", I tell her and she stopped crying, is that all that takes to calm her down?.

I closed my eyes, and felt her warmth, I'm trying to freeze this moment, as long as I can.
Its the first time I hugged someone after so long, she's healing something in me that she didn't even break ,I can feel like I'm breathing after being suffocated for years.
With each passing second, I'm getting out of each bad day I had in this past years, she's like my sleep medicine, she relaxes me ;everytime.

But there is saying "Once bitten, twice shy; I can't let my gaurd down this easily ,I have to protect myself.
I break this little comforting hug, and tell her to head for breakfast.
It was pretty awkward, she was silent, and I was still in shock of what I felt there.
I told her to do dressing of her wounds, for a second I was about to say , bring it I'll do your dressing but I stopped.
After breakfast I got up and my eyes met her;she smiled and said thankyou and I forgot to form any word, her eyes are puffy from crying ;why is she like this why?.
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I try to distant myself as much as I can , she is also having her exams so she's pretty focused on that,good thing.
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My breath got caught in my throat when my eyes landed on her lips, pink soft plump lips.
She never really apply a lot of makeup, still her lips look so red,sort of hot pink.
She let out a shaky breath when I touched her fingers making her leave the corners of copy; I know she is fearing me.

"Sure", I asked as if I asked myself if I'm sure about the proximity of this closeness, the taste of her sweet breath, and touch of her warm skin.
I'm sure if she wouldn't have replied in 10 seconds, I would've kissed her, she was attracting me and this doubt solving session would've just turned into some makeout session or even more.
Everytime I get a step close to her, a voice in me say, to put my gaurds up.
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Getting ready to take her to meet mom, mom is getting chemo this week and on the same schedule she have her exams and in between that she can't meet her obviously.
I was taking out my shirt from closet when my eyes caught on a box of necklace.
Mom made me buy it for her when we got married, more like a present on a wedding night that we never had.
I never gave it to her, I always thought she don't deserve it, and not that I think she deserves this now, but last time mom came and ask me if I gave her or not infront of her and she looked at me dumbfounded.