Boy across the street (KSM/HHJ)

eighteen

Hyunjin PoV

No one ever told me that it would be so hard to find a part-time job without being rejected.

I sent emails, I called, I even went into stores to personally ask if they could use some help. But everyone said they had enough staff and didn't need any more employees.

I sighed deeply and looked at my hands.

Maybe I was the problem.

The wind blew through my hair and I breathed the autumn air into my lungs. I sat on a bench in the schoolyard, heard girls two benches next to me talking about me and could see others eating with their friends. Suddenly someone came closer, I didn't know who it was at first but then I could tell it was one of Seungmin's friends.

Changbin.

"Hey, can I sit with you?" he asked with purchased food from the buffet in his hand. I looked at him and nodded.

Why did he want to sit with me? I've never exchanged a word with him.

He opened the packaging of his sandwitch and took a bite. "Don't you have anything to eat?" I shook my head, then shrugged my shoulders and answered him: "I forgot and the food in the cafeteria is too expensive for me."

"It's really expensive, but I'm hungry," he said, taking another bite of his food with a smile on his lips. I watched him almost finish eating it and said nothing.

He looked around briefly as if he was afraid of being seen by someone and then started to speak: "I know you like Seungmin."

I blinked a few times and then asked, "What do you mean?" I played dump, he didn't need to know. I hardly knew him. But he wasn't stupid either and tried to talk to me about it. "Hyunjin, do you think I'm blind? I notice the way you look at him. You're clearly into him."

A quiet sigh escaped my dry lips. I though noeone would notice it. Denying it wouldn't help, he would still talk about it. "Yes I like him but why do you care?"

He crumpled up the paper that was wrapped around the already eaten sandwich and threw it towards the garbage can, it looked like it was going to fall in but then it fell into the grass next to it. He didn't care.

"I care because I'm Seungmin's best friend and I want to know who won his heart." I raised an eyebrow and crossed my arms. "Won his heart? I think it's just one-sided love, Changbin."

The older one grinned, "Maybe. I don't know, but I know he would be too shy to make the first move so you have to do it, okay?" A little further away I could hear two voices that I recognized, Minho and Seungmin. They were just coming out of the school building into the schoolyard.

Changbin stood up and wanted to leave but turned to me once again and whispered: "If Minho acts like a jerk again, tell me."

Then he went to his two best friends and put an arm around each of them's shoulders. I watched them walk away and disappear behind a tree, there was a bench there as far back as I could remember.

"That was a strange conversation," I murmured and then dug into my bag for my notebook. When I couldn't find it I realized I hadn't brought it with me after it got wet, so I decided to do homework. Which I never did on lunch break. But I had to keep me entertained somehow.

I put my headphones in my ears and turned on some music. That's when I started to fall into my own world. Instead of doing my homework, I scribbled on the worksheet, a flower but an eye instead on the yellow nectar.

A song that made me feel so much every time I listened to it started playing and at that moment I started to space out even more. Like Alice, I fell through a tunnel into another universe, a completely new world. But I didn't look for a rabbit that was late or painted colorless roses red. I just sat there in a field full of flowers, flowers that I had just drawn. They stared at me, what was a little scary, but still this imaginary world comforted me.

Sometimes it just happened, it was like I was trapped. I probably just wanted to escape this world that scared me and didn't treat me fairly. Even though I often hid my feelings, it was eating me up from the inside. I still couldn't believe what my parents had done.

And I had no one to talk to, at least not yet. Maybe Seungmin was the solution.

The school bell was so loud that I could even hear it through my headphones so I packed everything away and went to my next class.

~

After my last class, I stood in front of the school building and waited until Seungmin and his friends separated from each other and went different ways. I jogged over to him since he was walking quite quickly and then walked alongside him.

"Did you tell them?" He looked over at me and replied, "No, I'm just telling them important things." At first I didn't know if he was serious but when I saw the slight smile on his lips I knew he was just teasing me. So I started smiling.

We took a different route to his house than he usually did, not past the cat, but I just went as he went and didn't question anything. But as we walked longer than I was used to, I started to find it strange. "Minnie, where are we going?"

"You'll see," he replied, adjusting his bag. As we walked around a corner I saw an old bookstore that looked a little run down but somehow beautiful.

I wanted to draw it.

The younger one walked towards the shop and when I stopped walking he pulled me along by my arm. "Why are we here Seungmin?" The latter said nothing and simply pulled me into the store to the shelves where there were books. But not just any books, but notebooks.

And then I started to realize it.

The other one let go of my arm and stood at a distance next to me with his arms crossed. "I didn't know which one you would want, so pick one," he said and my chest tightened.

My heart started beating faster and my surroundings started to feel surreal. It was a small gesture but for me it was more than that.

"That's not necessary," I said quietly but he stood firm and really wanted to buy me one. He was stubborn and wouldn't let me go until I picked one.

When I finally picked one I looked at him smiling and could feel warmth in my body as he smiled back.

And that was the moment when I really realized that I loved him.

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