Boy across the street (KSM/HHJ)

fourty

Hyunjin PoV

I told Changbin everything, every little detail of our argument and how it made me feel. Meanwhile I drank tea that the older one had made for me and enjoyed the warmth that came from the drink.

All of this took so much of my strength and I felt so weak.

But even though Changbin was Seungmin's best friend, he listened to me carefully and showed understanding. He seemed like a trustworthy person, someone I could trust with things.

"And I don't know what to do now," I said after I had told everything that needed to be told. He seemed to think for a moment and therefore stared in the room. We sat at the kitchen table in the living room, his parents weren't home, I didn't want to ask because it wasn't my business.

"Maybe wait a little? Don't rush things and then talk about it calmly," he said with a serious face.

"But Seungmin is so stubborn he won't want to talk to me. He's such an idiot sometimes," I said, leaning my head against my arm.

"I love him, I really do and I always want to have him by my side but if he always overreacts like that I wouldn't be able to stand it," I sighed loudly and my heart clenched at the thought that if we didn't stay together he would at some point hold another person's hand would lie in someone else's arms. Would grow old with someone other than me.

And I dont want that.

The older one smiled at me and said: "I can see how much you like him and long before you two became a couple I saw him watching you but he wouldn't have admitted to himself that he liked you. I'm sure I'm so sure you'll sort things out again."

I sighed and leaned back in my chair. "I hope so..." I mumbled and took a closer look at the house. It was almost as big as ours, my parents', just a little bigger. The furniture was better placed and cleaner than ours.

The table I was sitting at was big not like the small table at Seungmin's house where a maximum of 4 people could sit. But he didn't need anything more - he lived alone with his father until recently. So there were only two of them.

My heart filled with sadness and pain, my chest heaving as I thought about Seungmin and his father's death. He had cried and suffered so much.

I was there for him, how could he think I was cheating?

I looked at my phone and saw that it only had fifteen percent battery left, so I got up and rummaged through my bag, which was on the sofa. But I couldn't find a charging cable. "Shit. I forgot my charging cable," I cursed and clutched my head, sighing.

"Do you have any charging cables I could borrow?" When Changbin looked at me he saw my phone and sighed: "Everyone in this household uses Samsung so no..."

"Okay, that's fine, I don't have anyone who would want to text me anyway," I complained grumpily and sat back in the chair.

All I wanted in that moment was to break down and cry. It would feel like all my bones were falling on me, but this strong urge to start crying was killing me.

"Hyunjin can I ask you a question?" I nodded weakly and listened to him. “Were you always alone before you became closer to Seungmin?” I closed my eyes briefly because I felt tears welling up and I wasn't expecting this question.

"It may sound strange but I've watched you a lot but always alone and didn't understand why. You're a very pretty guy, gentle and so many people idolize you at school so I wondered where your friends were and why you were always alone. I never understood why Minho hated you, but then the reason why was deeper than I thought and I should have realized why," he said and curiosity shot up my blood vessels.

"Why did he hate me?"

"It's not that important... Can you answer my question?"

A sigh left my mouth and I said: "Yes. Nobody had ever befriended me in this school and my old friends stopped being my friends. I hate approaching people. I actually always felt very alone but when I watched Seungmin, in no weird way and saw your friendship , I was always very jealous of it but also happy for you three."

We talked about some deep topics, with him it felt so natural and I could just talk and talk and not stop. But we got to a point where we were so tired that we decided to go to sleep.

He had a guest room where I could sleep. It was large and the bed was very comfortable. I sank into the mattress and it felt like I was melting into it and falling into a deep sleep.

But I still had nightmares and kept waking up in terror.

I had the same dream again and again, Seungmin and I were walking hand in hand on a street and suddenly a truck started to sway and the gravity caused it to fly halfway onto Seungmin. He screamed for help and wanted me to help him up, but my feet didn't move, I stood there rigid and looked at him.

Until I walked away without looking back.

At this point I didn't want to go back to sleep so I sat up and stared into space. My phone battery was dead, I couldn't listen to music and was too lazy to get up to get my sketchbook. The one that Seungmin gave me.

I was still angry with him and didn't want to see him anymore but Changbin was right, I had to take it easy and talk to him like normal people.

I hope he will listen to me.

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Sorry for not  posting in a while school is ugh and work too so yeah ~Yumi