50 shades of Red (gumshall/ Gumlee fanfic)

Rust

It was a pleasant date i suppose. As far as dates go. I mean i wasn't experienced in the world of dating. I loved Marshal's dates, but that doesn't mean it's okay for me to compare both of them. i felt stumbly and clumsy mess in front of Anthony. that mall trip helped me understand that Anthony was confident and valued his appearance. He had a very shy way of presenting himself but he was confident nonetheless. His new black hair shined and highlighted the speckles of gold and brown in his eyes. the cut complimented the shape of his face rather nicely. With his clean pressed clothes he looked like a model who was slumming with his high school colleague. This made me flustered. I couldn't stop fumbling with my jacket and trying to not mess up.

what could i possibly mess up? You know... Besides everything? realistically i lost my grace a tad and found myself faking smiles. i put a mask on allot. i was too focused on my posture. i was irritated from the amount of flirty looks and talks people were targeting at anthony. Anthony didn't stop them. He took me shopping. And when i mean shopping i mean he bought clothes that he thought that would suit me.

Let me tell you it wasn't comfortable cardigans and sweater vests. i got one flannel shirt (my first one ever), a pair of vans, varius skinny jeans that were a bit too tight for me, and soft graphic T's that showed my collarbone too much and were a little snug. Anthony thought they looked fantastic on me. so he bought all of them. He wouldn't let me look at the total. He pushed me to change immediately into the new clothes. I didn't exactly prefered them, but anthony looked so happy. his face lit up in a way that filled me with importance and that I mattered. He took a picture of me with my hands in my pockets and a small smile on my face.

And when he dropped me off at home. we shared a fiery kiss. the kind that was all fire and passion. Electric danced across my stomach in feather light steps and sparks came of my cheeks leaving a red hue. it was a powerful kiss. The kind that left you confident and valued. He nipped me lip with his teeth and i gasped. After that he withdrew and chuckled. he lightly brushed his hands through my hair and told me, "i should go now before i can't stop." and that was it. that was the end of the date.

Yet after all the anxiousness that had built from waiting for anthony, the awkwardness on my part on the date that kiss forced me to find my footing. it was like i existed. i was a person. Not a doll. a prince . a boy friend. I was a person with primal wants and needs. Anthony gave that to me without making me feel childish, hapazardly giddy,or reckless.It flet safe. How could that be wrong. It didn't feel wrong per say. It was just it felt routine. like i could do it reasonably for a long time. like school was or going to a doctor's appointment. Yeah. that was it.

Latter that day i found myself sitting in my room and caressing tiger lily flower pedals. In the back of my mind the texture reminded me of someone's cheek. i traced the lines of it absent mindedly as i thought with the red pot cradled in my lab. It tranquilent scent soothed my racing thoughts slowly. There was something i was missing something. I was overlooking something in my life and the pieces where just not adding together.

I flinched as my phone vibrated angrily from my desk. I set the pot down on the carpet to look at the caller. Marshall. I set the phone down. put the pot on my desk.

Perhaps i could get some studying done.

The next day was peculiar (to say the least). There was no way it could have possibly been normal. the MBSOC (most beautiful student on campus) was still in the process. this was the final day before the results and everyone was in a buzz in the school hive once again. Apparently i had made the top 20 yesterday,much to my dismay. Ashley was excluded since she had suddenly transferred (Dj Candy could have not been happier). I Started review for a period test in advance placement history and a new project for statistics so that was exciting. There nothing like a new academic adventure to get the buzz going.