when love dies [akkayan]

what happened

Ayan tried to kill himself on a Tuesday night. On a Tuesday night he made an unconscious decision to end everything. On that same night, Mew saved him, showing himself like an angel, pushing him away from the edge.

Ayan didn't die on a Tuesday night.

Ray was born on a Wednesday afternoon. After Mew gave him the idea of starting over, building a new life for himself, thinking about himself first. Maybe that's selfish but, at the time, seems the only way to try and find happiness again. So Ray is born on a Wednesday afternoon. It that same afternoon, Ayan is gone, even if his body still breathes and his heart still beats.

From that point on, he chooses to be Ray. But will life let him make that choice so easily??

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 Ray POV 

That night, after talking to my mom, and Mew, I introduced myself to Top as Ray. It's the first time introducing myself at that time, and still it's easier than it probably should be. Is it really so simple to leave my old life behind? To start over? Will Top be mad if he ever finds out that's not my real name? That's mostly the only lie I tell him, so maybe he won't be mad, or maybe he won't ever find out. 

I tell Top my name is Ray, and I'm running away from my old life after having my heart broken, tell him about my uncle and my ex boyfriend, about my depression, but I don't go into details. He still understands, offers to help me. Offers to let me stay with them, again, for as long as I need. 

I can't say if he just likes helping people like Mew, or if he just supports his boyfriend through everything. Still he seems like a good person, so I thank him and accept their help. Maybe I'm also accepting their friendship, maybe that's what they are really offering.

That would be nice.

The next morning reality hits me when I check my phone and see Thua and Kan have been trying to talk to me. Texting, calling. It's my second day missing classes, so they are probably worried, trying to figure out what's wrong. Answering them right now would give space for conversations and questions I'm not really ready to yet...maybe later. I'd like to keep them in my life, obviously, but memories of them are filled with memories of Akk as well, our lives are too intertwined. So I choose to ignore them, for a while. Hoping they would forgive.

I also decide to ignore the fact that Akk still hasn't said anything to me. If I cry about it while showering no one really needs to know. 

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Thua POV 

(let's see what's happening while Ray is away, shall we??? BTW in this the guys will still refer to Ray as Aye because they don't know what's happening yet, but for everything else it's gonna be Ray)

It's been two days since I've seen Aye, and I'm honestly getting worried. I know he has been down because of Akk, and I don't even know what to do to help them. I refuse to believe Akk doesn't love Ayan anymore, after everything they went through together. They have a kind of love that only happens once in a lifetime, the one everyone else can see. But lately, Akk's been acting weird, distant, different, and he won't talk to anyone. I don't know if anything happened or if Aye is right and he just fell out of love.

Whichever it is, it's killing my friend, slowly, a little bit everyday. His eyes don't shine anymore, he doesn't smile like he used to, whenever he's not at classes, he's sulking somewhere, alone, unless me and Kan force him to hang with us. But now he hasn't been at uni for two days, and I can't talk to him. He's not even answering Kan, so something must be wrong.